Two Sides of A Coin
by Cuz I'm Nice Like That
Summary: Is Hook ready to let his anger over Milah's death go? Is Regina redeemable or is it too late for her to recapture her goodness? The Queen and The Captain are like two sides of a coin, eerily similar and utterly the same. And with their similarities, they must face their fears, they must face their past and they must face their demons with a little help from Dr. Hopper.
1. The Fears

_Please forgive any grammatical or spelling errors :) He who is without comma, cast the first semi-colon!_

_PS: This may be a one-shot or this may be something more-idk yet..._

_-__**iiwasalwaysthequeen**_

They were like two sides of a coin, they looked different, adorned with an individual identity-But they were the same. The world had used them for the same purpose and they had reciprocated in a like manner. They were made the same way, shaped by the tragedies of their life. Looking in each other's eyes was like looking into a pained mirror, expressing the same hurt they both felt. Separated, she could feel him. His ups, his downs, his angst, his joy, she was inclined to know. Others would be none the wiser but she-she always knew.

And he with her.

Their extent of faith in the world was the same; They had none. They trusted no one but each other, sometimes dangerous but often imperative in survival. Someone...you need someone in the world to trust. Without trust there is nothing to pull you back, no rope to rear you back from the darkness. Together, they had the ability to edge the well of no return, together they could take the town with their manipulations, their plans and their revenge. They could take the world if they wanted to..._If_ they wanted to.

They didn't want to.

Together they had the ability to pull the other back from the well, to hold them back when they looked ready to jump into the familiar abyss. When the comments would get to be too much, when life would get to be too overbearing-They had each other. When the inevitability of destruction was ahead, together they could make the inevitable impossible.

A dark pair they were, unseemly to the common eye. But when the stares didn't matter, when the glances were cast aside and the comments fell on deaf ears- their despairs didn't matter. And wasn't that the point? To turn the villains from their ways, from their anger. The enchanting thing about their love was that they found it in each other.

It was nice not to be judged, to be loved for their perfect imperfections. It was redeeming of the human race to be able to give oneself to another and not regret it seconds later. So when the storm raised and the wind kicked up-When the flood waded against their legs and threatened to knock them down, they stood the test of time. Because they had given themselves to each other. He had accepted her jagged edges and she had accepted his misshapen sides. And without that to stand in the way, to separate them-They fit like two puzzle pieces, through which nothing could divide.

Yes it was overwhelming, yes it was risky and yes it was a leap over a cliff-but nothing scared them. At this point, after everything that they had endured respectively, allowing someone to love them was their biggest yet last fear. But over time, the anxiety of hurt dulled and worry of abandonment lessoned. They trusted each other and no one else-a gift and a curse.

Two things could come from building your world upon someone else; they could fail to meet your hopes and pull the ground from under your feet or they could be everything you hoped for, and the only thing that happens is the growth of your world, your hope, your faith.

And as time went on, they could only hope for the latter.

But in the midst of waiting, time would continue to test them, test their strength, their ability to resist temptation. But what time had underestimated was their ability to bring each other back, back from the well of darkness that they seemed so fond of.

It was now a rarity for her eyes to shine a violent purple, or a flame to summon within the palm of her hands. It took a lot to rile her, to extend her hand so that a body was pinned against the wall struggling to breathe. But of course, now her periods of silence were more frequent, a substitute to replace the outburst of her temper.

She was seeing Dr. Hopper, well they both were, but not together. He was just as much of a hot head as she was-if not more, he was just between at subduing it. Though his quest for revenge was at times irrational, he was oddly enough a reasonable person. He longed to avenge his love, wrongly taken from him. He longed to be loved, to be allowed to love without having it taken from him. He just wanted what others had...Was that so bad?

"Do you still love her?" The question was open to hang in the air, reverberating from each beige wall in the room until it fell on the Captain's ears. With a hesitant ease, his pen flipped between his index and pointer finger, bifocal eyes seeking an answer to a much deeper question. "Milah?"

The Captain held the man's stare, never breaking contact yet never officially making any contact whatsoever. His mouth was clamped shut, posture sunken into the green love-seat that position him across from the makeshift therapist. "Have you ever loved someone?"

The question was vague but Archie obliged him, leaning forward in his chair as the sullen pirate continued to stare ahead, at him or the wall-he couldn't tell. "Romantically? I-I can't say that I've been so lucky." He gave a tight smile, leaning forward. "Is that why you're so reluctant to talk about your past-You don't think I'd understand?"

His brow barely lifted, but the incredulity was clear in his eyes, wide and reminding Archie of his better half. "Do you honestly think that you would?" His pain wasn't to be scrutinized by someone who hadn't the slightest experience of what he felt. Not a textbook or a curse could endow him with the empathy to feel his loss.

"I believe that I can help you through it." Archie was on a mission-to open the heart of the sarcastic Captain, to dig within him to expose that which had been long locked away. Though he might have had too much faith in himself.

"How can you help me through something that you admit to know nothing about?" He was agitated but his face showed no trace of it, emotions hidden well beneath the surface. "The Queen requested that I come here to 'explore my feelings' ,as she so delicately put,-And while I hate to disappoint her...The endeavor to 'help me' is beyond your reach."

"The Queen." Archie noted, nodding his head before scribbling something down on a yellow pad that Hook neither bothered nor cared to look at. "Is that what you call her?"

"Well that is her name, is it not?" Hook challenged, annoyed that the man nitpicked at his word choice and his actions. He didn't want to be psychoanalyzed-He just wanted to move on.

"So you respect her?" Archie asked softly, watching as the man immediately reacted, no longer sitting in the stature of his position, his title.

"I love her." Killian supplemented, his stare descending into a glare. The cricket knew nothing of their relationship, of their love. He could barely see passed the glass on his nose let alone into the depths of their companionship.

"And you'll protect her-"

"With my life." He intervened sitting up in the chair, forcing Archie to hide his excitement. Without even knowing it, Killian had given Archie everything that he was looking for, peeling back the artificial front without even realizing it. The subtle movements of his jaw from left to right told Archie that the Captain had resorted to grinding his teeth against each other, containing his anger as a memory seemed to pass over him. The look in his eyes glazed for a fraction of a second and Archie was given a glimpse of what he knew there lied more of.

"Because Milah died-"

"Murdered." The Captain growled, heel now pivoted against the floor as his leg stretched out and he took a defensive stance. "She was murdered."

Archie nodded in understanding, his voice growing softer as he spoke. "Milah was murdered and now you're worried about Regina." Killian turned to the insect, holding himself to the couch as to not jump up against the man. He bared his teeth with a silent snarl, opening his mouth to speak but nothing came out. His only response was the faintest gleam that shone in his eyes, masked by his anger. "You're worried about Regina..."

Killian's fist was balled against his mouth as his elbow sat, bent on the armrest. He looked off, no longer wanting to talk but the weight on his chest had begun to weigh on him. "..because I...didn't protect her." He spoke through gritted teeth, words muffled by his fist as the image of her body falling limp to her death played in his mind. He remembered her eyes running back in her head, he remembered the way her chest fell with the last breath she took.

He remembered everything.

"Who didn't you protect?

His eyes slowly inclined in acknowledgment of the man, though he never spoke. Dr. Hopper know damn well who they spoke of, who he didn't protect. The source of his pain was clear; the weight on his shoulders evident.

* * *

_1, 2, 3...1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...1, 2, 3, 4...1, 2...1, 2,3, 4. _The pattern was inconsistent, like her. And they both had excuses for being that way, both frayed at the edges and torn on the sides. The imperfections in the couch were barely noticeable on the surface but if you looked hard enough, the count would fail to add up and the true nature of what appeared put together would begin to show.

The thought brought a faint chuckle to her lips, a noise that stole Archie's attention as well. He had watched her count the seams, wondering what she saw, what had her so enthralled as to spend nearly 10 minutes doing something seemingly trivial. "Did you know...That purity in itself is tainted by it's definition?" He net his brows, urging her to explain with a hope that her thinking might lead him to some insight as to what she was so distracted by. She shrugged, her thumb stroking a stray thread on the armrest. "The world we live in...it promotes purity in such a way that the pinnacle that's praised is unattainable-No one, not even Snow White can master it-yet everyone expects me to." She flicker her eyes in his direction, gauging a reaction from her mention of his dear friend. His indifference allows her to close her mouth, placing her hands in her laps as if to give him her attention.

"Is that what you think?-That everyone expects you to be perfect?"

"Well the notion is unrealistic but yes-That's how I feel. I'm not allowed to make mistakes because they're blown out of proportion, they're exasperated and beaten to death because of my past." She pauses, pondering for a moment. "In fact, I think that they expect both from me-And that's what makes it so infuriating."

"Both?" Archie urged, coaxing her to finish.

"Both as in-They expect me to mess up, and they expect my downfall and when I do mess up like any normal human being, it's as if I'm not allowed to even though it was expected of me the whole time."

Archie nodded, leaning back as Regina did the same, mimicking her posture. "Who's they."

"Snow and her cronies." She answered immediately, the distaste clear in her voice.

This however didn't move him, it was her omission that concerned him. It was her target of those she cared about least and the leaving out of those she was most attached to. "What about Henry? What does he think?"

"I don't know, I'm not allowed to see him." She snapped back, immediately regretful of her tone. But her son was a hot button for her, something that riled her spirit. "I can only hope that he's sees my efforts however, I'm not naive." She shook her head, as if she could no longer do anything to change the outcome. "They never give him the whole truth." The anger began to fester as she thought about them wasting no time to tell Henry that she murdered the man that she now sat in front of but waited days before telling him that Snow was 'partially responsible' for her mother's death. "Can we move on?" She asked abruptly, sitting up further.

"Sure..." Archie watched as she began to taper her fingers against the seams once again, casting her glance away from him as he flipped to a new page on his yellow notepad. "Do you mind if I ask you a question?" Her lack of answer urged him on, clearing his throat before he spoke. "What's your biggest fear?"

She looked at him quickly, her stony expression switching almost instantaneously into a blinding smile that confused him. "I'm in love." The peace that passed over her face was something that couldn't be copied, something that couldn't be made up. "For the first time in a long time-I love someone..." She paused, her words catching in her mouth as her eyes gleamed in a similar fashion that Dr. Hopper had previously seen in her counterpart. "I love someone and I know without a shadow of doubt that they love me too." Her tone was still entranced in the love she felt but the aggression was still present when she spoke. "For the first time." Thoughts of Henry's unconditional love seemed like distant memories-but of course they were. But it pained her to think of it like that, to think of their relationship as something long gone, sincerely passed and uncertain to be revisited.

Her jaw set firmly, the warmth fading from her eyes as the pain that lied beneath them bubbled to the surface. "I don't want to talk about my biggest fear because it's already come true...I'm irredeemable." She leaned forward to express her thought, eyes pinking with each word that spilled from her mouth. "I'm ready to be let it all go, I'm ready to accept what I've done, I'm ready-I'm ready to be a better person and no one cares."

She turned her head from him slowly, setting her mouth on her fist, just as the Captain had previously done, unconscious of their similar proclivities. "I was afraid that it would be too late and now it is-" The yearn to weep was clear in her voice but she maintained her composure, shrugging as if to sweep the feelings from her back but as she expected, no relief was felt. "Yes I have Killian and I love him-I do." Her voice broke under the weight of her words that spilled from her mouth next. "But he's _all _I have."

He had so many questions for her. Dr. Hopper wished to investigate her feelings but it was rare that she would let him see her. Sure, she had told him of her vulnerabilities but he had never seen it personally, especially not the raw nature she currently displayed.

"My father is dead, my mother is dead, my son hates me and no one sees me-" She shook her head, an escaped tear slipping down the fist that pushed against her face. "-Not for who I want to be...it's too late." Regina sniffled, straightening out her skirt to distract herself from the conversation at hand, choosing to instead, adjust her outfit. After 3 minutes of flattened hems and pulled collars, she glanced at the concerned cricket gone therapist. "There, now you know my fear and considering that they've already come true-Can we talk about something else?" The vulnerability is gone from her voice and the evidence of her tears began to subside as she pulled herself together and distanced the painful thoughts from her mind. "...please." The aggression tones down and Archie nods slowly, knowing that if he pushed her any further, she would likely shut down.

"So you and Captain Jones..." He began, flipping another page before meeting her eyes. "How about you tell me about him in...three words or less." And just how similar the Queen and the Captain are became painfully obvious when the words that tumbled from her mouth were simply,

"I love him."

_So what do you think? Is this a one-shot or the prologue of something bigger? Hit me up with a review or drop something in my in-box and let me know your thoughts :)_

_**-iiwasalwaysthequeen**_


	2. The Fights

_So I was worried because I got a good response from the first chapter and I knew that I wanted to go in this direction if I continued it but I just didn't want it to be 'not as good' as the first chapter but perhaps this can be something more :) Please forgive any misplaced words *tell me though because I might not see them lol* And He who is without comma, cast the first semi-colon! *Big thanks to stuckinreversemode & inlovewithlanaparilla*-There would be no posting of this chapter without them and their reassurance ;) & thatonechickwiththeface who made my day with her encouragement 3 Love this fandom 3_

_-__**iiwasalwaysthequeen**_

The dining room table was long. This is what she noticed as she sat at one end feeling as though he was an ocean away. The dining room table was long, almost like an instigator in their relationship, used to separate and divide them. The room was a hollowing quiet, the only sounds being the tapping of _a _nail against _a _white coffee mug, filled with _a_ steaming tea. They had hit many roadblocks before but none compared to what they currently faced, and though it was not insurmountable, it placed a difficulty to get around.

He was in deep contemplation, she could tell this by the way his hands clasped together in front of his mouth and his shoulders sunk into his neck, taking on a posture of defeat. She was torn, wanting nothing more than to explode at his silence, to scold him for his insolence and to throw a tantrum for his indifference..._But it made no difference. _No matter how much she wanted to act out, the greater scale of reason tipped in the latter and she just took a sip from her mug, flinching lightly when the clock struck 12.

Tick

Tock

Thirty minutes had passed and they remained in the same position, neither having anything to say for lack of knowing how to say them. She didn't have a plan this time, no diabolical scheme-There was no shortcut in the maze or subterfuge to hide behind. Had she not known the man before her, she might've been wracked with worry over what was to come but...She knew the man before her. The man that had told her time and time again that when the flood waters rise, they shall not fall; When the winds pick up, they shall not sway.

But he never accounted for this either.

"We have to leave." The words were mumbles that barely made it across the table that separated them. He cleared his throat, looking at his shoe that stuck out to the side of the table; his actions of indifference only angered her, boiled her blood. She was being calm because she trusted him, because she knew him-because she loved him. But he gave her silence, he gave her indifference, he gave her...worry.

"Killian-"

"We have...to leave." His voice had risen but he still refused to meet her eyes, refused to see the confusion reflecting back at him. "That's just it...we have to leave." With a deep inhale, his shoulders rose and fell, hands rising to cover his face as he processed his thoughts.

"No." Her voice was so low, so guttural, he had to peek past his hands to make sure that it was her. He watched as she opened her mouth briefly, her finger pointing in his direction as the other hand gripped tightly to her mug, keeping her grounded to the table. To think, it takes her a second, mind twirling at the prospect of leaving Storyrbooke, leaving everything, leaving _everyone. _"I am _not_ leaving Henry."

It was declarative in that, she couldn't be forced to choose. She wasn't going to abandon the child that she raised-even if he didn't want her. If she left, it was almost equivalent to giving up on him, giving up fighting for him. And if she gave up-then he truly wouldn't be hers and she would be left with a void in her heart-as if she had cast the curse all over again.

Her movements were dramatic, the screeching of the chair sudden as she got up from the table, her glare lingering with his stare, begging for her compliance. As soon as his mouth was open, her mug jutted out in his direction and he was halted, her red-rimmed eyes widening. "I said no."

He raked his hands through his hair, blowing out a harsh breath before his hands suddenly slammed against the oak that separated them, his temper escaping him and the wood vibrating in response. "We don't have any other options!"

She shrunk back at his actions but he failed to notice, missing the fear that passed through her-if only for a millisecond; he missed it. "We have plenty...of options..." She refused to raise her voice as he had, startled by his sudden show of anger. Her eyes hardened in his direction and he sighed immediately, biting his lip as a shaky hand moved through his hair once again.

"Regina love, I-"

And she was gone.

* * *

"So.." Archie peeked over his bifocals, lifting a brow at the couple before him. Something had changed dramatically, similar to a ripple affect from person to person. The unity that he bared witness to near days before when they were separated left no remnants when they were together, seated on opposites of a love seat like children. "Obviously there's some tension here."

Her eyes closed upon the mention, body leaning towards the armrest in any attempt to avoid the Captain that sat next to her, closest to the makeshift therapist. The sullen pirate huffed once more, eyes glancing in the direction of his estranged love. His eye caught a silent tear slipping down her face, and his hand flew to her leg, offering a comfort that he couldn't give.

She winced at his touch, curling herself closer to the armrest that he slowly began to hate. An armrest that, as ridiculous as it seemed, was able to provide her more than he could at that point. "Regina.." His hand dared to touch her again and she flinched as if his touch had caused her a pain that she never thought he would inflict.

Without warning she removed herself from the couch and sat down on the red chair that pivoted in a similar manner to Archie's, leaving the Captain to brood on the couch by himself. "She's been like this for two days. " He announced openly, giving the cricket a surprise in it's own right. Instead of hiding behind his fist, though he refused to make eye contact, he was opening himself up as opposed to his better half who was shutting down.

They were out of sync.

Archie glanced up at Regina briefly before turning his attention back to the Captain, seeing her staring off at the wall and occasionally wiping the assumed tear from her cheek. With a sigh Killian finally met Archie's eyes, hesitant in his words-unsure of how to handle anything. For the first time in his life-He didn't have a plan either. "I can't touch her..." He flexed his fingers against his thigh, short nails grating as the material in frustration. "She won't talk to me..." He dared to look at her, eyes immediately refocusing when he saw how she was seemingly ignoring him. "She-" He stopped, slapping his hands on his legs in thought as he remembered something. "Just this morning-She made me walk here and when I asked why she didn't answer me-She just disappeared."

"She-she.." Archie fumbled with his words, dipping his head in question. "She used magic?" Without reply, the Captain looked at the Queen once more, anything he could have said being halted by Archie's speech. "Regina-is that true?"

She heard them but she didn't; at this point she was shutting everyone out, wanting to be alone with her thoughts. Yes, she had slipped that morning, yes she had used magic and the minute she did it she regretted it. But there in lied a bigger problem-Her giving up magic was for Henry, to show him that she was capable, to show herself that she was capable. Lately, all she could think about was giving up the fight-letting him go, leaving him be with his ..._family_. But the minute she began to give up, she began to regress and back into the shell she went.

"Oh.." Her mouth simulated a small _'o'_ and she adjusted herself in the seat,turning a bit so that she saw Killian more so than Archie. "Am I allowed to speak now?" The nerve in her voice struck a cord with the cricket, hearing a cold chill that she had long parted with begin to makes it's way back to her heart.

Dr. Hopper watched as the front between the couple chilled even the more, noting the way the Captain continually ran a hand threw his hair and the Queen avoided his eyes, both wet with emotion. "Okay..." He sighed, putting aside his yellow notepad. "...okay...Someone tell me what happened here." He eyed the both of them, edging on his seat. "Obviously something has transpired that I don't know about...So tell me."

What was the oak table between them?

Neither party moved, both acting as though the words had passed through their ears without registering. Archie, seeing the stagnant nature of the session moved to face Regina, hoping to coax her from the walls she now stood behind. However, before he could utter a word, her body was already turned to the only person in the room that she wanted to address, the only person that was supposed to truly understand her.

"You..." Her voice wrought with a betrayal, wavering under the low tone. Killian looked up to see her shining eyes as she pointed a finger at him directly but not accusingly. "...will _not _talk to me like that again." She shook her head at him, battling between the simple act that it seemed to be and the volumes that it actually spoke to her. She didn't like to feel threatened, when she did-She used magic. And her dilemma lied in the fact that when he slammed his hand down, she could feel the magenta sparks crackle at her fingertips. Why was she gripping her cup so hard that morning? Because she saw her biggest demon in the love of her life and had she let go-words lacked the appropriation to describe what she might have done.

"That's what this is about?" He whispered, his voice tapering lightly over the memory that played in his mind.

Her jaw set and she leaned back, not willing to cave for his sad eyes. "Part of it."

He covered his mouth unconsciously, huffing a heat against his palm. For the first time he looked at her and she at him: a true acknowledgment of each other. Dr. Hopper sat back in his chair, feeling as though any interference would disrupt the process that they seemed to be taking themselves on without a need for him.

She watched curiously, eyes set on him as the realization played on his face and he identified the root of the issue. He understood why she shrunk from his touch and flinched at his nearing-

The King.

"I love you." She breathed out hastily, an exhale catching her off guard. A hand raked through her hair gently, lips forming a tight line after her declaration. The Captain longed to take her shaking hands with his but knew that the sting of rejection awaited him if he did. She was practically trembling but she couldn't accept his touch-not then. He couldn't fix a crack not of his own making.

"I do." She admitted in a mumble, meeting his eyes once more. "But you need to understand that the last man...Who shut me down.." Her hands flexed at her thigh, another thing that the Dr. Hopper noted in similarity, watching as she ran her nails lightly against her skirt. "Who shut me down...Who-" The words stopped, crestfallen down her throat as the simultaneous memories of door slamming, vases breaking and bitter tones replayed in her mind, bringing a haunting glass to her eyes. "The last man that did that died."

"Regina your default can't be violence-"

"I never said that I was going to hurt him." She challenged directly, putting a meek cricket back in his place. Dr. Hopper's mouth clamped shut and he decided to sit the conversation out a bit longer, watching as Regina turned back to Killian who stared at his hands, cupped in his lap. "But if he pushes me-I will walk away." The chill begins to thaw in her tone and the smallest quiver in her lip gives her emotions away. An ache knocked within her heart at the thought of hurting him or losing control over herself or her emotions. She had control-but to an extent and that was something that she'd rather not test.

Her head shook involuntarily as the sobs that built within her were unsuccessfully suppressed. "I will walk away from you..." She sighed shakily, the memories of her previous victims and enemies leaving her bereft of control for her emotions. All she could see were the bodies she left in her wake, the hearts she had taken in her fury, the lives she had stolen in her anger. It was hard to believe in your own redemption when it seemed as though only two people saw it, and the more she dwelled on it-the more she doubted it. "I will walk away before I-"

The Captain looked up to see the Queen crumble under her sobs, under her past. She covered her eyes with a hand as the weeping left her gasping for breath, needing breath...needing him. She grit her teeth against the emotions that wracked her, turning to face a Captain that wanted nothing more than to wrap her in his arms. "I don't want to hurt you." The whisper was barely audible to the cricket straining to hear past her cries but the pirate heard, he heard her and his heart broke.

Because when she broke-he broke.

When she hurt-he hurt.

When tears fell from her eyes-they welled up in his own.

Dr. Hopper watched curiously with baited breath, waiting for the Captain to embrace his better half but no such moment came. He began to wonder and soon realized that the pirate did wish to comfort her, he did wish to hold her-But she needed to be set free from her fears-by herself.

She wasn't the crutch type-And the demons faced alone back in FTL had to be dealt with alone in Storybrooke. He hated it though, watching as the memories broke her, as they opened old wounds and when unbeknownst to himself-he opened old wounds as well.

"Excuse me." Regina rose from her seat, giving neither of them a moment to object her departure before the door swung closed and she was gone-again. Killian had risen as well but fell back down when she closed the door, leaving him to stir as she collected herself. The same hand stretched out against his thigh and he fought himself not to go after her-Not to do what she didn't need, what he wanted-but what she didn't need even if she might've wanted it herself.

Seeing the turmoil, Archie rejoined the session, pushing his glasses up once more before leaning forward. "Captain do you know the story of Humpty Dumpty."

Hook's eyes flickered up with annoyance, eyes barely rolling. "My love just ran out of this room-a place where she is supposed to get help-practically drowning in her own tears and you want to talk about the dumb lad that fell off of King George's wall?"

Archie ignored his brash nature and continued, cupping his hands together. "Humpty Dumpty isn't of our world, he is of this world and _the lad _is portrayed as an egg."

"What's your point?" Killian questioned quickly, eyes batting between the cricket and the door that his Queen had stormed out of.

"My point is that Humpty Dumpty." Archie began in all seriousness, cupping his hands to portray an egg once more. "Fell-tremendously and he was broken or in Humphert's case, badly injured." Archie noted the man's Storybrooke alias as a way for the pirate to connect the dots.. "Guards stormed the wall, wanting to help this young lovable eg-boy who had just taken a fall that no one-_no one_ is expected to survive-Do you know what happened next?"

Killian shrugged, not yet noting a connection. "He broke both of his arms and I believe he hurt his ankle-And despite all of the trained knights and guards there-Who was able to wrap his wounds?" Killian shrugged again and Archie's eyes lit up as if to relive the moment right then and there. "He-He was the only one that was able to figure out that if he ripped his shirt, he could make a sling for one arm and if he used his tarp, he could make a sling for his other arm. The other guards, all dressed in metal armor had thought that if they just picked him up he would be fine but he was just in more pain." Archie leaned closer, urging the pirate to look up at him. "All the king's horses and all the kings men...They couldn't put Humphert together again-Humphert had to help himself-No one else could have done it because it only caused him more pain...He had to figure it out for himself."

"So you're saying that I need to let her be?"

"What do _you _think I'm saying?" The Captain pondered his question and for a moment he was left without a thought in his head. All he saw was an egg-Regina was a fragile...egg. She was hard on the outside but _oh so_ delicate on the inside. And if she fell and he tried to help her without her helping herself...

Only a mess would be made.

"How about we take a break?" Archie removed himself from the chair and Killian nodded silently, half of him processing the cricket's analysis and the other half wondering what the Queen would say-when this was all over-about being compared to a man named Humpty Dumpty.

_Next chapter: The second part of this session and find out what the fight was actually about, why CH wanted to leave and what else do they have to hash out?_

_**-iiwasalwaysthequeen **_


	3. The Frustrations

_SHOUTOUT to parrilla-adkins!_

_**-iiwasalwaysthequeen**_

_I don't want to lose you. _ It was a sadistic echo really, delicately lacing his thoughts with her voice. The waiting was torturous, forcing himself into a numbness that kept him from running to her. He was giving her time, time to collect herself-He couldn't always be there, he knew that. He didn't need to be taught isolation, something that he was far too fond of to not know of. It irked him really, being told the ins and outs of his better half when that was indeed what she was-his better half. They were one in the same, separated only by the way they traveled, both having gone on the same road.

The cricket sat at his desk scribbling a stressful script down on a crinkled notepad, imprinted upon by each patient he had seen. The minutes pass and time moves, but the door never opens-She doesn't come back in and the advice given to him begins to rot in his mind. The longer she is gone, the more futile the cricket's words seem. He knew her. He loved her. He knew when to step aside.

And when to step in.

The pirate shot up from the couch, catching the cricket's eye as he continued to scribble haphazardly in a script only legible to him. He watched as the Captain made rushed strides to the door, tired of waiting. What he didn't see however, was the contort of surprise that passed his face when he saw the center of his affection standing in the doorway, her reluctance to come in the room obvious in the way she carried herself.

She lifted her hands slowly, fingers curling into her palm as she did so. She stopped half-mass, standing before him with tear-stained cheeks and eyes pinked with sadness. Her fingers twitched with a nerve that she hadn't felt in a long time, having grown comfortable with him. But for some reason she seemed nervous, knowing her intent but failing to act on it. Seeing her hesitation, he captured her lips with his in an embrace that froze the hands that had risen to touch him. His hand reached around her waist and pushed her closer to him, meshing the curves of their bodies until he no longer felt separated from her.

Her eyes fluttered closed, having no reason to remain open. She relished his touch, the mere days that they had jarred, that they had been out of sync had been hell. It was like playing a record with no needle, being a bird without a song-Being at odds with the most powerful magic of all left them in a state that could only lead to moment like this. Where the office door is shut, keeping out the prying eyes of insect therapists-Where bodies are frozen against each other, layered in clothing yet always feeling the beat of the other's heart.

Her hands regained motion, trailing his neck, looking over every part of him. She wanted nothing more than to leave that office, than to go home-to stay home, stay in the abyss of their happiness without having to leave. But when the bully of reality was accounted for, she could do nothing but sigh into the crook of his neck, her cheek meshing against his skin. I'm still upset with you." The hardest thing-but most necessary thing to do, was to push him away. But now, feeling the rise and fall of his chest against her palm, the snug hold of his arm around her waist and the peace that passed through her-She never wanted to go without it again.

X

The difference was noticeable, the air was lighter, but the problem remained a problem. A problem that was yet to be spoken but was obvious in presence. Though a table no longer separated them, there were things to be discussed- issues to be hashed out and fears to be ironed. Despite the issues waiting to be addressed, the cricket was more enthralled with body language than anything.

The way his body turned so that his elbow could rest on the armrest, leaving a noticeable gap between them. Then there was the way she sat with her posture straight, a hand cupped in her lap, listless in motion. But the most palpable observation was the sight of their hands joined at the center of the love seat, in the gap between them. A palm rubbed against a palm on the line drawn between them, in their anger, their frustration-They held the other's hand.

They had each other.

"So..." Still in the dark, a leading word was uttered to spark some sort of dialogue. They had been sitting there desolately, Archie looking at Killian and Killian looking at Regina and Regina looking at her hands. They all had an object of attention to deflect from the issue, to deflect from the reason's why they were all staring at each other.

The cricket stared at the Captain with a yearn to press him for information, to in a metaphorical sense, 'crack his chest open'. He wanted to see what the Queen saw in him, what Mila saw in him. The Captain stared at the Queen because she perplexed him, being one in the same with him yet adorned completely different. She offered him a map that he couldn't read and a sea of endless proportions, too rocky to sail and too vast to explore. The Queen stared at her hand because it meant destruction. When she felt an emotion quiver in her heart, the reaction took place in her hand and things happened-bad things happened.

It was silent because the cricket wanted answers, the Captain was faced with an ocean he could not set sail to and the Queen was failing to reign over her own body. The all had one job, one title-And their circumstances had beat them into silence, questioning their ability to fulfill their job-their title.

"When I first held him he was so..." The words died on the tip of her tongue and she looked up, holding her hand out, stained with the blood of her victims and etched with the memories of her terror. "...small." Destruction rang in her mind when she saw her palms, the lines striking them and veins pumping within them. She hated looking at her hands, only a cruel reminder of what she had done. Before she could look at her hands and see Henry, the small bundle that she cradled, that swelled her heart the moment his big eyes met her teared ones.

But that was before.

Now, she saw Henry and she saw the lies, the betrayal- She saw what she didn't see, which was the son that she had loved growing up right out of her grasps and barely away from her touch. She saw the choice that she was faced with, and looking down at her hands she knew that breaking the promise that she had made to him-as he slept in her arms, as her hands held his head tenderly and his fingers grabbed aimlessly at the air-breaking that promise would take a toll on her that only magic could upstage.

"I told him that I'd always be there for him." She turned her hand over, eyes darting from left to right as she lifted her other hand from his grasps and looked at both of them equally, searching for something. "I-I held him." She turned her palms out, forming a makeshift cradling position with her arms as she turned to the man who was supposed to understand her. "I told him that I'd never leave him." His eyes rounded to look into hers, memories scorning him as his mind filled with his pleas of Baelfire and his redemptive attempt to take care of the young boy and the cold slap of dismissal that he was faced with as a result. "He's my son." Her voice hardened, but not passed the point of reaching. It was a tone of reassurance, of stance-the tone of a mother.

"And I am not going anywhere-Not without him."

A hard palm descended down the Captain's face, now faced with a dilemma-the sea he couldn't sail. He didn't see any other options, unable to fathom any other solution to their problem. They sought a panacea, a true solution that left them with everything they needed rather than everything they didn't want. But she-No, he made it difficult, something that he had to get over.

"Do you think that I want to be in this position?" Her question was directed at his frustrated expression, reading a look that she could only decipher as being 'fed up with her'.

"Love..." the term of endearment sharply left his tongue, leaving eyes to flash up at him daringly-tempting him to say what he knew that he couldn't. With a sigh, the endearment won out and all that was spoken were the ominous words of, "You don't want to know what I think."

Her body turned immediately, coordinating with the words that spilled from his mouth. Her brow rose in a challenge, mouth open with silence that she didn't know how to fill. "Spare me-okay? Spare me the imperialistic chivalry-the gentlemanly chauvinistic attitude-Like my being a '_lady' _hinders me from being able to process whatever sentiment you take seconds to think of." Her words spat across the couch and landed on his face, leaving him to hear the rustling of her hands as she roughly pulled her coat to herself. The brown of her eyes waved over the pirate from head to toe, having only two words to leave him with. "Spare me."

Dr. Hopper opened his mouth, feeling the settling of the atmosphere. Perhaps he could be the leveler in the climate of changing temperature. However his ideas were quickly squashed when the pirate tuned back to the Queen, a defiant smirk quirking his mouth. "Spare you? What-now my attitude bothers you, my protective nature bothers you?" He nodded, passing his thumb over his chin, clearly an irritant. "Says the Queen who became who she is because of the lack thereof-"

"You have-" The lump in her throat dissipated as her head shook in dismissal. "-you have no right." She warned, voice leveling into a deep octave.

"Oh I'm sorry, her Majesty wishes to remain unquestioned." He mumbled roughly, growing angrier with each drop of denial that she spilled. The peripheral view of his eye caught her eye and the gloss that began to separate them. She was shutting down, tuning them out internally because she didn't want to hear it. Invisible to the cricket, the pirate could see the way she was sinking into the couch, eyes hazing as her jaw set firmly. "No." His hand landed, palm up, on the dividend of the love-seat.

"Give me your hand." Archie, confused, looked to the Queen and opened his mouth with the intent to comment on her indifferent expression but was silenced when the pirate spoke again. "You can shed your wrath all day long-You can scream and do what ever it is you please-But you do not get to shut down." There was fear when she shut down-when either of them shut down, there was bound to be fear. Because when they shut down the light disappears until darkness is the only thing left to be familiar with. They didn't need to become friendly with the darkness or walk the edge of the abyss that wanted dearly to pull them back in. "Regina." Immediately, Archie scribbled onto his yellow notepad, having lost control over the session but retained the ability to pick up on their social novelties.

When he calls her name, it is stripped of her title and of the burden. He knows how to reach her, how to reach the woman the he is connected with , the woman that wanted freedom-not power. The woman that longed for her birthright of freedom rather than her legacy of power. It is the first time that he hears the Captain refer to the Queen by her first name and the cricket scribbles away as his palm lays open and he repeats his request. "...your hand please."

And the Queen obliged.

"I'm sure you two realize that in each other not only have you found love-but also, a formidable sparring partner." He chuckled lightheartedly at his words, his laugh fading into the silence when the couple failed to reciprocate his humor. "With that in mind- We all know that arguing isn't going to solve anything." The pirate's rhumb moved at the top of her hand, pressing against the joints that aligned her fingers. His eyes were on her, hearing the cricket but seeing the Queen, noting the insect's advice but noticing the Queen's proclivities.

"I'm also sure that I could be of more assistance-if -if I knew what the issue was." Dr. Hopper offered, skeptical that the pair was even paying attention to him. Her eyes had fallen closed minutes before, leaving his eyes to watch hers as she did so. "Are you-"

"I'm fine."

"She's fine."

No argument was left when both halves spoke up, voicing the same opinion. And though the cricket was not convinced, he continued on nevertheless."It seems to me that you-have grown used to being unprotected...so much so that you don't recognize it's good anymore." He turned to the Captain, leaving the Queen to meditate on her thoughts. "And you-you're so worried about no protecting who you love that you're crossing the boundary between protection and freedom-"

"I'm not taking her bloody freedom away-She can go and come as she sees fit!" The eruption was unexpected, leaving the cricket with an open mouth and no words to come from it. Eyes trained on his counter, he sat back in his chair as to eliminate any feeling of threat from the pirate and allow him to calm down. "We can't leave because of her boy-" He stated, sitting up in his chair as his hand waving in front of her as he spoke, their joined fingers remaining on the couch. "I understand that she can't leave-But we also can't stay with her getting death threats and harassed on the streets." The pirate looked at the cricket, shaking his head sullenly as his voice lowered and his anger subsided into frustration. "She can't even see a doctor without being accused of trying to cast a spell-"

Dr. Hopper saw the man's futile attempts to protect his better half angered him. The haunting inability of him not being able to do so in the past made this time all the moe pressing that he got it right, resulting in brutish ways that his love was not accustomed to. Any time a threat was posed, it was against her. Now to have a threat posed for her, the reaction was equal in that-She couldn't tell the difference. She was forever without a covering and now that one was being offered, reception was indifferent.

She sighed, her index and thumb working at her temple as she leaned against the armrest, holding firm to his hand as it laid on the line that separated them. "I attempted to go see Dr. Whale at the hospital and I was accosted and escorted from the premises by 7 dwarfs and a red wolf." It was simple enough, leaving Archie with more questions than answers.

"Why were you going to see him?" Regina opened her eyes, allowing them to read an expression that she didn't care to speak-She wasn't going to tell him.

"It's not imperative to the situation." Killian insisted, waving his hand at the detail. "..a Victorian omission, if you will."

"You want to leave town because you were kicked out of the hospital?" Archie summarized. "Did you do anything to warrant the escort?"

"The only thing that I am guilty of is being naive enough to believe that the self-righteous army of Snow White would do anything but shun me despite my efforts to amend my past." Archie squinted, mind boggled as though he were being told to solve a thematic equation without the proper information to do so. X plus Y equals 8? What is X? What is Y?

"I don't need Dr. Whale, I don't need to see a physician every month and I don't need medication-"

"You're being stubborn-"

"No you're being stubborn-You've been on a boat for most of your life and now you're trying to tell me how things work on land and I'm not hearing it-

"Okay one love, it's a ship and two-In your land there were herbs available and midwives on hand, all of which you have no access to because no one wants anything to do with you or me for that matter."

The cricket's eyes darted from left to right, watching as the joined hands rose and fall with each animated protest. It never unclasped but occasionally it did slide over with a hint of frustration or loosen in irritation but never-never did it unclasp. The once insect gone man was at a loss for words, looking at his paper and back at the couch, neither offering him a viable option. He hadn't foreseen the development nor would he have time to process them.

The door swung open with ferocity only true urgency could bring. Beyond the oak was a frazzled Prince, eyes crazed as he faltered seeing the pirate and the Queen. "I-uh-Arch-Archie I-we need you."

"David..." The cricket stood, putting his notepad aside. "This is highly inappropriate; I'm in the middle of a session-"

"It's Henry..." His words were manipulative, roping the Queen into the mix to water down his own transgressions. "And Emma-Henry and Emma." The young noble bent at the waist, hands on his knees as he caught the breath that escaped him. "A-a chasm...in the road..."

"A cha..." The mumbles to herself ceased as the reality hit her. Why in the world would the Savior be exposed to a chasm, likely an unstable fissure in the road. Rumpelstiltskin wouldn't be that inept, the Blue Fairy was too 'pure' and she had been in her session. She had sensed days before, that the beam of dark magic had been tipped in recent weeks but she was reticent to tell anyone. They would all blame her regardless of her involvement.

But Henry.

"Henry." Killian stood when she did, her eyes glazed as they met with the Prince's and she took in his disheveled appearance, likely from attempting to pull her son from his blonde mother as she expelled an accidental chasm into the world that now held her like strings to a puppet. "Where?" She questioned, invading the conversation.

"Regina, we don't need you." David spat, looking back to the makeshift therapist. "Archie we need you to talk to Henry-get him to cal-"

"He is _my _son." She growled, teeth baring at the fake Prince. She looked down, silently panicking as the words left her mouth and she was bereft of a plan or solution. "...something that no one seems to understand." She glanced at the Prince and then at the Captain. She felt undermined, as a mother, as a person, as a woman. It was her choice if she wanted to leave, if she wanted to forsake what she had promised him. No one-_No one _had the right to take away her liberty to be a mother.

_This_ was a matter of freedom.

The quirk in her eyebrow tells more than she does and not a beat is missed when she snaps her eyes closed and the nostalgia she feels is impalpable but permeable, shaken by worried calls of the Captain. She misses her son, she missees his scent-He smelled of crayons and apples. A little bit of her and a little bit of him. She'd always had a heightened sense a smell, her memory laced with the scents and aromas of the this world and the next.

It was a gift and a curse.

Hesitantly, she grabbed the Captain's forearm and before he could object, or the cricket could offer his voice of reason, they had dissipated into a cloud of purple smoke that left the Prince skidding in his boots to catch up. The sweet waxy aroma left her senses and she opened her eyes, immediately being hit with the billowing screams, car alarms and windows shattering.

Before he could question how they found the source of chaos, his feet trembled at the vibration of the concrete. Feeling the ground move beneath them, the Captain was swift in charging at her waist and knocking her to the sidewalk as the last of the crossroads in front of the pawn shop were sunken and the fissure grew, expanding to take more of the road, more streets and if prolonged-it would take lives.

"Are you hurt?" She squirmed beneath him, seeing the worry of blue orbs sink into her own brown eyes. But she couldn't answer him, visibly shaken from impact, from the noises, from the screaming and the sight of Emma Swan's hands connecting with the green smoke that she had absorbed long ago.

A death curse.

Someone, something had opened a chasm and placed a death curse upon it. And now the only thing keeping her son from losing his weak grip on the edge was the weakening magic of Emma Swan. And this is precisely why she couldn't leave, because he needed her, because as a mother-as his mother, she was endowed to give him what other's couldn't. She could do what other's couldn't.

She could save him.

A crumbling scream erupted from the Sheriff's mouth as her hold on her son and the portal began to dissolve under her fingers. The blonde shook with fervor to push on but she was failing, the sweat beading down her forehead as the pained face of her son attempting to hold on etched in her mind.

"Henry!"

The eruption was thunderous.

The sight was devastating.

And a green smoke lingered the air of Storybrooke.

X

_Next: ? Just think of it this way-more drama makes for way better therapy sessions. And don't worry, the action won't take away from the heart of this story. There will still be Captain-Queen sessions but I need to add *small* story lines so that their reactions and consequences can play out in the sessions. Each chapter will have sessions and the action will not overtake them in the sense that they will consume the chapter. If that happens, I'm sure someone will eat me before I am able to post it lol_

_**SPOILERS:**_

_Is it the same curse?_

_Where are the fairies?_

_Regina+Emma+Hook+Charming drama._

_Review and drop a comment or storyline suggestion :)_

_**-iiwasalwaysthequeen**_


	4. The Feat

_Big Thanks to __parrilla-adkins__ for exploring the feelings in the second half of the chapter and changing some things to make it just right. She's a life saver! IMPORTANT-This chapter does not have a therapy session but there is an explanation for that. I've decided that I'm going to have 3 sessions(3 chaps) and the 1 chapter that just explores the happenings of their lives, like in this chapter. So in accordance with the pattern, the next three chapters will in bulk be therapy sessions and then there will be a new action chapter :)_

-**iiwasalwaysthequeen**

The rain smells of cinnamon. The town is in an upheaval, ripped apart by a chasm and what comes to her mind is that when it rains, when the grass becomes dewy and the pavement becomes wet-a sweet aroma begins to hit her nose. Ironically enough, when lightning strikes and the thunder booms she smells sweet things, spicy things-never the rain itself.

She misses her son, she missees his presence, his scent-He smelled of crayons and apples. A little bit of her and a little bit of him. She'd always had a heightened sense a smell, her memory laced with the scents and aromas of this world and the next. Those thoughts carry her actions and propagate her ability to do what is necessary despite what is wanted.

Thought now after months with the Sheriff he probably smelled of leather.

The silence is deafening and rain begins to pound against the untouched windows of the shops. It was mother's day and it was raining. The air lingered with apples, crayons...and cinnamon. The nostalgia present kept her from writhing in pain as her back met the concrete and the clock tower struck three; it dimmed the brightness of the sun and left an aching in her heart. 214 days, she counts-When she was allowed to mother him, to love him without fear or rejection. She had went into recluse...today is the day, today she must stand the test of stares and judgments and ridicule. Why endure the torture?

To save her son. To save the town.

Her bones tremble at the prospect but she remains in the middle of the street, stiff as a board. Credit is given where credit is due and she must admit that not everyone hates her. Ruby smiled at her the last time that she got coffee. The dwarf scowled but she ignored them, lightened by the werewolves grin. Some people accept her redemption while others pound the pavement to taunt her, to see her mess up-to prove themselves right and prove her to be fallible, incapable.

Idiots.

If there's anything she doesn't like besides being told what to do, it's being proved wrong. If not for Henry, if not for Killian, she does it for herself. Redemption can not be true unless it is for the cause of redemption-not the benefits.

No one has moved since she arrived, no one but the pirate who sprinted to pry the boy from his blonde mother as her body became subject to the power that she yielded to. She is used to the solitude, even in the un-solitary they watch her she knows, but they don't bother her. It is mutual, the distance; they don't enter her bubble and she does not burst theirs. It is mutual at best, hostile but mutual.

Now she is risking herself for them and no one says anything as the rain begins to turn from trickles to drops and the sweet smell fills her nose. The captain smells of metal and roses, the hard and the delicate, the metallic and the sweet. She must remind herself why she puts herself in harms way, why she almost kills herself by taking on the brunt of dark forces and walking along the abyss that she had long sworn off. Why does she sacrifice herself?

The crayons, the apples...the metal, the roses, and the rain that smells like cinnamon, blurring her vision as it falls to her face. The sight is stirring, the author and the finisher of the curse that brought them all there standing on opposites sides of a chasm as they fight against the price paid for the magic brought. The pirate attempts to placate the boy as his mothers suffer, as the blonde is being pulled into the darkness and the brunette is absorbing it.

The ground seizes and the chasm contracts as the queen is arched passed her limit and the magic begins to lift from the abyss and pour into her, from the savior to her, from the chasm to her, from the air-to her. If it is taking from her or adding to her, she doesn't know. But one thing is clear-her ability to withstand much more is limited as the green energy forces her muscles to obey it's direction and endure it's pain.

The rain was almost instantaneous when she arrived, peculiar to her upon first glance but now it made sense. She needed to smell the cinnamon, to savor the sweet while she endured the storm. She needed the nostalgia to propel her and the rain to push her, to catapult her to the place of being...someone. She didn't want to be good, she didn't want to be bad. She didn't want to be the villain but she didn't want to be the hero. She did't want to be labeled in a world where labels were all that seemed to matter.

On the last contraction of the chasm, a wind broke between them and the women were expulsed from the scene leaving a green mist in it's wake. The blonde Sheriff rolls on her side, eyes wide as the curls that adorned her blinded her in the search for her son through the legs of scared citizens. She had to see passed those who blocked her view, ignore the car alarms, the screams of terror. She had to ignore them all and find the brunette boy that had hung off the side of a fissure in an attempt to save his mother.

The boy that had initially fought his hold now shakes in his arms as he is shielded from the sight of capsized cars and unconscious bodies, blasted by the eruption. He yearns to find his queen but knows that her appreciation lied more in him staying with her son rather than abandoning him in the face of chaos. "Are you hurt lad?" The boy shakes his head and the pirate nods in understanding as his eyes shift from left to right with the obvious question begging past his eyes.

Where is his mother?

"Get off my kid Hook." The blonde sheriff is strong, a characteristic that becomes apparent by how hard he hits the street when she throws him. The child's protest fall on deaf ears as she hugs him and ushers him away from the 'bad guy', their conversation growing fainter with each stride they take, walking to complete a Charming family hug that turns his stomach.

The rain has soaked his clothes and a chill begins in his heart before it drops to his shoes in a quick realization. Where is the Queen? He begins to push passed those running in the streets, those panicking. He was now running in the streets, he was now panicking, checking the unconscious that laid on the streets and the faces of those he passed by.

Of all places, the woman who had saved the day and took on the thankless job of redemption sat against a car door clutching her ankle. Her eyes were closed and her black hair stuck to her face like a matted raven, the rain blearing his vision but his heart assuring him of her identity. With one touch to the shoulder,she knows it is him and her forehead falls to his chest, any strength that she thought she had being gone upon contact. When everything was said and done she knew that the abyss wasn't just giving or taking-it was doing both. It had taken everything out of her and given her absolute weakness. No one else could have obstructed the Savior's powers and absorbed the foreign magic of a chasm while closing it at the same time...Perhaps Rheum Ghoul could have but she never seemed to show up unless asked for.

And the Dark One was no where to be found.

So when he lifts her from the hard street and her soaked being melts into his soaked being, she doesn't complain. She doesn't stir, she doesn't protest; She lies in his arms as the rain pours down on them and the scent of cinnamon filters through the air.

And if he tries hard enough, he can smell it too.

X

"They...they just took him?" Her voice is desolate of strength and the question is followed by a broken sneeze, one that she attempts to pass off as an exhale but he knows better. The rain beats against the window and the thunder booms around them as he finishes wrapping her ankle in the gauze from the first aid kit. She grimaced at the prospect but settled into the idea knowing that they can't walk to a hospital without starting a ruckus.

The cinnamon is gone and all she sees is the rain, all she sees is the abyss that she had sworn off, all she could feel is the pavement that she hit when she landed. All she can feel is the pang of hurt that she should have expected-Good gets you nowhere, or in this case it gets you a sprained ankle and a cold. "The-There's no point is there?" A hoarse whisper leads him to look at her, watch her as she eyes the rain sodden window with a dangerous interest.

Sad eyes look upon sad eyes and neither of them knows the answer. Is there a point to redemption when the consequences seem worse? Heavy is the heart of those that carry the responsibility of 'the right thing' for there is no tangible reward. No good deed goes unpunished, but no one tells you that until you've completed the deed. She knows that now, feeling the ache of every bone in her body as a bolt of light flashes against the window pain. It's been 214 days since she was last allowed to mother him, and today she was allowed to save him, to be his hero but the moment was stolen when he was whisked away without a second glance.

"If I ask you for something, will you give it to me?" The scoff that returns his question is light but clear enough that he can hear it. A brow lifts by a small fraction but her eyes never leave the window, her fingers playing against the buttons of her pajama top.

"Now is not the time for sexual favors." Now it's his turn to scoff.

"Is that all I'm good for love?"

"On a good day-Yes." He ignores her charred tone and sets the kit on the nightstand. She ignores the moves he makes, his lifting of the blanket to cover her waist down. She ignores his shuffling about the room, his settling on the bed beside her. She tries to ignore his whistling-but it doesn't bode very well.

"What on Earth are you doing?" Laying back on her pillow, she peers up to see her mate sitting against the head board, twiddling his thumbs and whistling a tune.

"I'm waiting for your attitude to subside." His eyes met hers and she rolled them. "...so that I may submit my request." Her eyes blink in his direction and he cracks a small smile at her annoyance before scooting down to be eye level with her. "I want my Hook back."

She doesn't move a muscle, seemingly unhasped by his question until her lips part to voice her curiosity. "Why?"

His shoulders fall in mock ignorance, as his hand creeps up her hip. "Perhaps it has to do with the hundreds out for your head or the fact that Prince Charming always has his sword-" His words are ceased when he feels the cool hide against his skin once again, covering the bud of his missing limb. Mouth agape, he looked down to see the hole where his hook should be. "I believe you forgot something love-"

"For now..." She enunciates, narrowing her eyes at him. "I'll give it back to you but on one condition." She turned, winding at the aching in her waist as her arm reached out and pulled open the top nightstand drawer to reveal his polished hook. "When we sleep it comes off..." Sounding like more of a mantra than a requirement, he eyed her closely.

"You're not going to ask me if there is any other reason...You don't want me to explain." She shook her head, reaching once more to turn off the light so that they were cloaked in darkness, the silhouette of their faces highlighted by the striking light in the rain.

Her answer began with a yawn, "Tomorrow...", and it ended with her curling into his embrace as the rain pounded against the window. "Tonight, we sleep."

X

Captain Killian Jones was not a morning person, that point being clear when he heard the alarm clock and scowled; particularly the time he woke up and stabbed his hook into the face of the beeping machine. Needless to say, the alarm moved to the Queen's side of the bed. There was coal in his eyes and gruff in his beard and the only thing that he could smell was the coffee that he wished to sip, to feel the caffeine burn down his hoarse throat. She was asleep for now, practically snoring-something he would taunt her for later on. Besides the snoring Queen upstairs, the Captain was free to roam in search of his caffeinated addiction-a taste acquired in the modern world. Coffee, coffee is what he sought. However when he rounded the corner into the kitchen, coffee was not the first thing he saw.

Henry was.

Scratching at his bedhead, the pirate blinked copiously as his weight shifted on the squealing wood beneath him. The young lad sat at the counter, shoveling cheerios into his mouth as he stared at the newspaper in mock interest that could only be mustered by the child of her majesty.

"Good morning." Muffled were his words, made jumbled by the soggy cereal in his mouth as his back faced the confused pirate who eyed the pajama clothed child.

He shuffled into the kitchen slowly, shirtless and in silk pajama bottoms that the queen likes because of 'how they feel against her skin'. It humored him to think that it was supposed to be how they felt to _him _that mattered, but nevertheless he wore them for her. So now he stood in the kitchen clad in the silk pajamas that the Queen favored wit no shirt, bedhead and eyes fixed on her ten year son that was supposed to be across town. "Are you and my mom together?"

The groggy pirate smoothed the curve of his leather jag against his abdomen, watching as the boy occasionally peered over the newspaper, awaiting the answer to his question. "Why?" Killian drawled, his good hand sliding to his hip. Henry quirked his eyebrow at the sight before him, a small smirk apparent by the curling corner of his mouth shown behind the paper. "What?"

He shrugged, taking another hearty mouthful. "You look like you're posing."

The pirate looked down at his posture, foot pivoted, had on his hip as his bare chest stuck out in habit, a prideful habit. "Why?" He repeated his question, attempting to ignore the boy's previous comments despite changing positions.

Henry shrugged, eyes scanning the crossword. "I don't know, maybe because you live here." The pirate was silent, at a loss for his answer-if he should answer him. Suddenly Henry put the paper down and his nose scrunched in curiosity. "And where's your shirt?

He let out a light chuckle, subconsciously crossing his arms over his chest as if to cover himself. "Upstairs."

"Why?"

"I was sleeping."

"In a bed.?

"Yes."

"Whose bed."

Killian squinted, feet sliding against the linoleum as he approached the counter. "You're curious."

"You're in my house."

The boy's tone is so serious that the captain can't help but let out a light laugh that is quickly rebuked by a trademark look, no doubt picked up from his mother. "You haven't been here."

"Yeah." Henry shrugged, digging his spoon at the broken cereal in his bowl, his actions letting the pirate know that his words had sunk deeper than intended. "But this will always be my home I was here first, for ten years to be exact." He looks up at the pirate, eyes narrowing as he jumped down from the counter, grabbed his bowl and took it to the sink before running hot water on the dishes. He turned off the sink and faced the pirate. "Where's my mom."

"In bed."

"Her bed?"

"Yes."

"Not your bed?" Killian let out a nervous chuckle, his hand rubbing at his neck as he was interrogated by a child who hadn't even cracked junior high.

"Were you in her bed?"

Quick on his feet, the captain made strides to the refrigerator, opening the door quickly. "Do you want some pie lad?"

"Do you love her?"

The coolness of the open appliance seemed colder when the question hit his ears, an idle leather hanging by the handle as his back faced his questioner. He didn't know why the kid was there-or why he questioning him, well perhaps he did know why he was being questioned. Despite his age, Henry was protecting his mother, despite their differences-He loved her.

And the Captain did too.

The boy's presence alone is unnerving not to mention the fact that the reason for his presence has yet to be explored. He does not know his intentions but he commends the child before him because he still wishes to protect his mother.

Turning on his heels, he bends at the waist in a small bow and he answers the son of the Queen, "With all..of my heart.", straightening himself to assure the boy of exactly what he felt. A rare smile, genuine in application graced the pirate's face as he awaited the boy's response.

Seeming to ponder the answer skeptically, Henry eyes the anxious pirate and noticing his uneasiness, reassures the man with a toothy smile that only an eleven year old can posses. "Good."

"You still haven't told me why you're here." He reached in the fridge and pulled out a white dish, bound to contain a dessert of some sort.

"That was intentional."

"Your family will come looking for you."

"Why would my mom come looking for me if I'm one floor away from her?" The boy answers sarcastically, earning a glare from the pirate as he reached for a knife.

With a delayed chuckle he responded, "You know that's not what I meant."

Seeing the pirate struggle to cut a straight line, he took the knife that his mother never let him look at let alone use and cut a small piece out, sticking the knife below the crust to lift it out in preparation for plating. "They went to sleep at 2am after trying to settle everyone down and fix the town and get repairs and therapy and figure out what happened...they won't be waking up for a while-it's just 7am."

Holding the plate as Henry set the pie down, he observed the boy before him-aged beyond his years. "You thought this out didn't you-you're clever."

The boy beamed with a pride that the Captain never would have thought to see. "I'm a Mills." It was surprising to see him so proud of his mother, a child who had a tendency to shun her. Rather than asking him about the sudden change of climate, he just watched as Henry began to cut another piece of cherry pie.

X

Stirring, she felt the pain of yesterday's events begin to take a toll on her body. She was thrown against a car so her back ached. She landed wrong so her ankle ached. She had a cold from being in the rain so her head ached. And beyond all the bodily hurt-Henry was gone, so her heart ached. Needless to say, she didn't expect a good day, nor did she expect to wake up to the smell of cherry pie invading her nostrils. She opened her eyes to a glossy haze and a blurry outline of her son sitting cross legged on her bed in front of her.

Eagerly waiting for her to wake up.

"H-Henry?" The strain on her voice was clear as she wiped at her eyes and attempted to make out the sight before her that couldn't be true. In an attempt to sit up, her body cried out in protest and she settled back into the comfort of her pillow, turning her head with glistening eyes and a smile. "Henry what-" She didn't need to complete a thought before short arms were thrown around her and she was lost in the embrace of her child.

"Happy Mother's day."

She suppressed the tears that she wished to spill but she also didn't want to unload all of her emotion onto him. Remaining strong, only a few tears slipped from her eyes. "Are you okay?" He asked softly, pulling away to look her over once more.

She laughed, sniffling softly. "The question is are _you_ okay?"

Her hand strayed to his cheek and with a sigh he protested against her question. "I asked you if you were okay."

"I'm fine." She intended to smile but an involuntary grimace took over her face as her body cried with the final movements she made to finally get up, betraying the words that she had just assured him of.

Luckily, Henry was otherwise occupied with his fingers to notice. Though despite that, he knew the truth "Don't lie to me." and the strong bravado that he had strutted onto Mifflin street with was gone, replaced with the strong but childish demeanor that she knew. "No you're not-you look bad."

"Yes, but there's nothing to worry about dear." Nodding, she noticed the darkness of his eyes, his aura being off. She knew that her presence could cause him to be 'touched by darkness' but this was something freshly implemented.

"Did you close the hole in the street?" Dark, hopeful eyes asked his mother, looking for a hero. When she nodded humbly, the fiddling of his fingers began again. "Gramps said Emma did but every time she did something to it, it just got wider." As much as she wanted to bash Charming for lying to her son, she couldn't say much in that department. The most that she could do at that point was listen. "Mr Gold is gone."

She blinked at his blurted memo, wondering if she heard him wrong. He held a pained expression as he spilled his heart to the only person that he could talk to know. The last person that he would have expected. "They accidentality opened the hole during their lessons and I heard the Blue Fairy say that it was too much dark magical energy; it needed to be expelled...so the universe opened a hole-Mr. Gold fell through." Leaning closer as if someone was listening in on them, he whispered softly, "People think you had something to do with it."

Stunned, she refuted. "I didn't."

He shrugged, voice returning to a mumble. "People think you did."

She tucked her head to meet him at eye level, touching his arm gently. "Do _you_ think I did."

"No." His response is ended with his back plopping on the opposite side of the bed, seemingly exhausted for a child his age.

"Henry." She called softly, confused as to the turmoil in his eyes, the wrinkling of his forehead being similar to someone double his youth. Before she could form a thought, a sneeze wracked her and she turned away from him, sniffling softly as her body dipped instinctively under the warm covers.

"You have a cold?"

Not wanting him to worry, she shook her head. "Allergies."

Handing her the box of tissues from the nightstand, he countered her statement. "You've always been a bad liar." Behind his words are more than coughs and sneezes-but curses and magic. "I asked to see you and they wouldn't let me, they said you were a bad influence on me...I wanted to see you-but I'm still mad at you.

She holds back the urge to protect herself, reflecting on the many occasions that he had forgiven Emma and held grudges against her. Jealousy has since subsided but it stung nonetheless. "You're my mom and I trusted you." The words he says pierce her heart, hearing the small voice of a broken child. A child who had one person in the world to trust with his heart. "-you lied to me...You made me think I was crazy. Your curse was more important than me." His tone was angrier, refusing to meet her eyes as he laid back on the pillow parallel to her. She watched, hearing him sniffle as a small hand wiped at the side of nose, blocking any stray tears.

"Henry I am so sorry..I can't redo what I did." Despite the pain, she slid closer to him. Reaching for his shoulder, his head fell to her chest in a heave as he cried for much more than she knew. "You are more important than any curse-ANY curse." She too cries; for him and for herself. "I failed you and I'm sorry-Henry I'm so sorry."

It was mother's day and she was allowed to mother him, she was allowed to make up for her flaws, to be his hero-to be the mother he always wanted, even if it was just for a day.

X

Unknown to mother and child, a wistful Captain stood by the doorway of the Queen's bedroom eyes glistening as the Queen got back the one thing she wanted, the one that kept them in Storybrooke.

Her son.

X

_Review or hit me up on Tumblr for comments or suggestions! Hope you enjoyed :)_

_-__**iiwasalwaysthequeen**_


	5. The Fallen

Ancient lovers believed a kiss would literally unite their souls because the spirit was said to be carried in one's breath. Perhaps it held some truth, metaphorically speaking. Maybe when one's lips press against another's, soul ties begin to spin. Well not every kiss, but true kisses-meaningful kisses, not the sloppy ones you don't remember the next morning but the one's that linger with no movement, that leave you with a gaze of wonder.

Perhaps, it is the smallest of intimate gestures that binds the soul, the stolen glances, the touch of thumb to thumb, the slow kisses. Is that why their relationship was so peculiar? Because it dared to defy the rules of the mushy fairy-tale, declarative in it's love at every turn. And therein lies the problem; what defines love and what separates it from infatuation. What they can't see, what most are too naive to recognize are that the stolen glances are all the words that they need, the way her thumb grazes his discreetly is more of an 'I love you' than one that's yelled from the rooftops. And what they don't see, the slow kisses, they're secret; their soul ties being something more sacred then man could fathom.

"Killian go do something. " Their relationship needn't be a distraction in the conversation that had been brewing for years. They needed to talk-The Savior and The Queen needed to talk and with the Captain being there things would already be too messy. They had waited until the Snow Queen and her Prince left, in too much of a rush to check their surroundings, looking for Henry.

She had Henry, hands on his shoulders as they waited on the knock to sound and be processed. Waited for a messy blonde to come skidding across wood to open a door, frazzled and disoriented. And when the time came, the blonde couldn't say that she was surprised to find the Queen standing on her doorstep. With their son.

"Henry, what the hell?" She mumbled, taking him in her arms despite his fight. Small arms resisted her embrace, finding release in her confusion before running into the apartment and up the steps before she could find the words to protest.

He left them to speak, the hazy eyed Sheriff with a bandaged head and the former Mayor with a bandage everywhere. Blue met brown and no words were spoken, silence being more of a comfort than the conversation when it begun.

"Did he come to you or did you take him?" With a familiar frown and tousled hair, she spoke in a low tone that was supposed to be threatening but came across as croaky and unsettling.

"I think you know the answer to that." Seeing no resolve to leave reflected in her eyes, the blonde stepped back to close the door as if that was all they had say one another. "Miss Swan..." She stared, jutting out her good foot to block the door. "I didn't come to return Henry-I came so that he could retrieve his belongings."

The blonde rammed a fist at her eye before crossing her arms over her chest. "And why is that Regina?"

"Because I'm taking him home." An invasion of space was made with the closing of it between them. "And maybe if you didn't smell of booze - if I didn't see the sparks coming from your hands or literally feel the magic oozing from you like a toxin-If you hadn't opened a chasm with the dark one mere hours ago then perhaps you would be able to stop me." Toe to toe, eye to eye. "But that's not the case is it?"

"Who the hell do you think you are-"

"I'm his mother-"

"Yeah because you've done such a great job at tha-"

"I have!" The exclamation was enough to quiet the enraged sheriff, an impressive feat at best. "And right now he is upstairs getting what he _wants _from this place because everything he _needs _is at my home-our home."

"Regina you manipulated him, you isolated him, you lied to him, you-you've killed people-"

"I'm sorry I killed Graham-I am. But at the time I did what I thought was best, if I had to do it again I wouldn't but had he lived-" The words left and silence was left behind it as the Queen realized by the way the Savior's eyes began to mist and her mouth formed a little 'o', that was a secret that she had yet to spill.

"You-" Her head hung to her shoulder, the side of her tongue piercing her cheek as she scoffed. "You killed Graham." The words fell as a whisper between them, once again silence being more of a comfort than the conversation itself.

It was quick, her movements; the way her hand lifted and collided with the Queen's identity. The way she stumbled back, a short cry sounding out in response to the pain. The way the blonde sheriff shook her hand in her charge but was held back by a one handed pirate.

"I believe we've been here before." Regina commented, her back facing the pair.

He studied her, the glassy eyed Savior who huffed and puffed as if her breaths were escaping her. His past was behind him, he was a gentleman-perhaps with a murderous urge indiscriminate of gender but a gentleman nonetheless. "Henry come down." With as much strength as she could muster, she called for Henry as the Savior struggled in the Captain's hold and the Queen hid her face from sight. "Killian." A warning. "Killian-" An order.

The shuffling of feet down the stairs prompted the pirate to let the savior go, short of her attacking him herself. The eleven year old in the midst of it all ran down the stairs without a second glance to either adult. Caught in the middle he chose to ignore the hardship and continue past the battered folks before him, his knapsack hanging off of his shoulder.

A crimson trail ran down the hand that covered her face, alarming the pirate and giving the sheriff a little satisfaction to save her last bit of dignity. She had been bested by a pirate and her son was walking back into the arms of the evil queen-willingly. They would have him-for now that is, while she is alone-while magic is burning through her veins.

But she has an army.

Glancing up at the woman who had given her hell and would continue to give her hell for years to come-she felt bad for her. Emma Swan was an ordinary person born into an extraordinary situation. Perhaps she would have been better as a Boston bounty hunter; especially when fulfilling her destiny as the savior seems to have saved everyone but her.

She was falling, it was evident in her eyes. If anyone recognized the look of resignation to life-it was her. If anyone recognized the evidence of looking into an abyss-it was her. She had been Gold's apprentice, she knew the drill; and allowing herself to become subject to Rumpelstiltskin power was the worst mistake that she could have made. And now she had to pay the price for her magic, a price that the queen had to pay not long ago.

Henry

Captain Jones extended his hand, reaching across the Sheriff as to block any interference that she could make. For now, she did nothing- she did not fight; for this was just the calm before the storm. Watching the two of them was peculiar, vision blurred by adrenaline and body wracked with liquor and magic. Her eye caught the way his hook held gently at her back and guided her down the stairs, telling her to tilt her head back as a crimson flow ran from her nose. She could barely feel the satisfaction of inflicting pain, punching The Evil Queen, because in the end it was her that was left alone at the top of the stairs.

Not the Queen.

X

"You're a queen love, it shouldn't be this hard to keep your head up." Killian tilted at her chin as she held a washcloth to her nose. "Henry-"

"I've got it." Taking a risk, Henry sat on top of the counter beside his mother as she waited on the side of the tub, being nursed by an impatient pirate. Fiddling with the ice pack, his eyes fell to the floor when he met his mother's risen brow, knowing the she disapproved. Killian shrugged, 'accidentally' poking at Regina's nose as he gingerly lifted the wet cloth to reveal her swollen, and most likely broken nose.

"Oh!" Henry laughed as Killian winked at him and Regina rolled her eyes.

"It's just his bum on a counter love, hardly a scandal." He smiled seeing Henry grin in the corner of his eye, glad to be saved from any backlash. He knew that she was tense and they both had heavy hearts. Henry made a decision, one that many adults find too difficult. He chose the path of missing one of his mother's for safety, leaving part of his family for stability-Charming and Snow always fought, too distracted to see their daughter's slip into the darkness. And in the midst, Henry was drowning with no one thinking to throw him a preserver.

"Would you-" Killian extended his hooked hand to Henry, loving that the minute he saw it up close, his eyes grew the size of saucers. "If you please..." He jumped down from the counter and gripped the curve of the hook, surprised by it's sharp point. "Turn it until it clicks." He did as he was told and at the resonance of the sound, he pulled back so that the hook detached and the Captain was allowed to move about freely without fear of injuring his Queen in the process.

Looking down he saw a shine in her eyes and directed his attention back to the enamored eleven year old. "Henry your mother is out of bandages-Would you..."

"Got it!" Knowing what he sought, he carefully placed the hook on the side of the counter and left the bathroom with enough sense to know that his absence was for more than another first aid kit. "Oh and mom-" He peaked his head back in, sheepishly looking between his mother and her lover. "I know you're in a lot of pain-Just...If you wanna.." He looked down, kicking his foot at the rug. "Just heal your nose and than no more magic-but just heal yourself." He hated to see her like that but knew that if the latter meant breaking a promise to him than she would gladly suffer the pain. She nodded and passed a slow hand over the bridge of her nose, wincing as the purple haze came and went.

"Now I'll just leave you two lovebirds to discuss whatever you can't say in front of me." They both chuckled in response. He chuckled; she laughed. He chuckled; she laughed. His chuckle subsided and she still laughed. He was silent and her laughter became sobs, sobs for her son...for her family. He was an eleven year old boy who had experienced what would have sent most adults into a nervous breakdown. He was losing his mother and his grandparents, a family that he just gotten and yet a smile was still on his face. In the face of others falling, he stood tall. With the fallen-He was standing.

"I can't leave him."

X

"You removed Henry from his home?" She felt like she was in the principal's office getting scolded as the cricket looked over his bifocals. He was using that tone-That annoying tone, kind of like Snow when she wanted her to admit a wrong so that she could raise her chin in self-resignation and assurance. The thought silenced her, allowed a moment of reflection. The more she looked at him, the more she saw Snow-for some reason she saw an enemy instead of a friend. "Regina-"

"Are you judging me?" The question hung in the air as Archie sputtered to answer, shifting in his seat.

"I-I just want to understand what could have possessed you to do something so drastic-something that could possibly jeopardize everything you've worked so hard for-."

"Redemption is nothing if I don't have my son." She leaned forward, a finger pressing into her chest as she spoke. "If no one else sees my efforts _but _Henry-fine. " She turned away from him, a hand pulling down at the hem of the pencil skirt that hugged her. "I didn't-_remove _him from his home, I _brought _him home-besides he came to _me_."

"Sheriff Swan said-"

"Sheriff Swan is an alcoholic."

Dr. Hopper pinched his fingers against the ridge of his pencil, the tension evident in the purse of his lips and hunch of his shoulders. "That's a bit far fetched don't you think?"

"I don't."

Archie nodded, closing his notepad and setting it aside with the sweat imprinted pencil that he was desperate to chew on. Hands in his lap, he faced her with a clear conscience. "Is there something bothering you Regina?"

For a second she considered ignoring him, jaw set as the cogs turned in her head. It was a second filled with doubt, and a dash of hope that she quickly renounced when she decided to tell him despite what he might try to say in the end. "Snow and her Prince came to see me yesterday."

_"I've got it love." A tired pirate shuffled towards the door with an eleven year old trailing behind him, his hook in hand. "Be careful with that aye?" Henry nodded quickly as Killian opened the door and recoiled at the sight before him. "Regina!" He bellowed for his better half as the opposite of their relationship stood at the door, the displeasure clear in the eyes that faced him._

_"Henry let's go." Snow extended her hand and Henry shook his head, clutching at the hook in his hand. "It's been 4 days, you've had your reprieve now it's time to come home."_

_"He is home." Manicured fingers wrapped around the hook and coaxed it out of the boy's hand. Killian reached behind his back and she clicked it into place, watching as the Prince jumped forward at the sound._

_"This isn't his home." Snow protested, stepping forward; Queen to Queen. "Him living with a witch and a pirate-carrying around sharp hooks for kicks, this-this isn't safe this isn't-"_

_"What? It isn't what you wanted? Poor Snow doesn't get her way and now she's on my doorstep to cry about it-" The anger was coming to a head and before she could say anything else, she turned to Henry. "Sweetheart, why don't you go in the kitchen with Killian- and check on the lasagna-"_

_"No!" Snow reached for her arm and Regina flinched, backing up at the contact. "She-She's been using magic." She spoke up, her tone desperate as she grasped at straws to keep her family together._

_"Wh-what?" He looked up to his mother, shaking his head. "For-for your nose-"_

_"Henry-"_

_"Before she took you." Her chin rose by the slightest fraction as she took a step back into the space of her husband "Archie informed us that she's been slipping and sweetie if that's true-you're not safe with her."_

_"Come on.." David reached out to him. "Let's go home."_

_Brown eyes clouded with a mist as he backed away, falling behind Killian before running up the stairs with only a door slam to punctuate his silence. The sound shook her core, only egging her closer to the edge as the indignant pair stood on her doorstep, thinking that they were right-thinking that they were the good guys._

_"I think it's time for you to go." When he spoke she could barely breathe, fury encompassing her as his arm wrapped around her stomach and pulled her back._

_Away from the abyss._

_Charming's mouth opened to speak and the door was slammed in his face as the Captain turned the Queen away. Her hands ached for their hearts but her heart ached for Henry, and the reality rung within her as she realized..._

_She could trust no one_

"I trusted you and you betrayed that trust..._again."_ Refusing eye contact, he was forced to talk to the side of her head, not knowing what to say.

"Regina I-I didn't say-"

"What didn't you say this time?" She scoffed, shaking her head at the circumstances. "But of course-this is what happens when you give a cricket a PhD." They were silent as the steam rolled from her ears and he searched himself for words, for an explanation. Should he tell her that they came to hin looking for evidence to incriminate her and he defended her but also told the truth. She had used magic but the extent that it had been portrayed was untrue.

"I'm done with this." Giving up she stood and stormed the room with a limp, giving him little time to stop her before the door slammed in his face. Perhaps now, he felt what she felt when the door slammed with Henry-regret, a loss of hope. His story had room enough for understanding but all he needed was a willing party-maybe if she would just listen to him. She was so close to her breakthrough, to getting to the root of her issues.

She couldn't give up now.

The cricket took in a gust of air before deciding to see if she had left, maybe even contemplating her decision in the hallway. He was a patient man, perhaps he could get her to understand if she just took the time to listen-see his side of things. However the thought came and went when the hallway failed to hold a woman in contemplation, but a woman in distress.

She was one of the fallen.

"Regina?" The call fell on unconscious ears, a body bereft of movement and expression. The Cricket looked upon the Queen, curled into herself even in a state of unknowing and panic set within him.

**TBC**


	6. The Flakes

_I know it's been a while but I needed a break. I was getting hate for this story and I don't see why-It's hardly the most popular HQ fic and yet stupid anons still found their way to my inbox. So please forgive the long-overdue post. I will try my best to keep the updates regular along with my EC fic, 'Into The Deep' and maybe, just maybe I'll get the itch to write 'To Neverland' again. Although you'll hardly need it with all the Neverland fics out there lol. Please enjoy this next installment :) _

**-iiwasalwaysthequeen**

It was layered, crispy on the edges with a spice from the red pepper flakes. It looked like it was protected with pasta but they were only thin sheets, easily penetrable if one tried hard enough. There was a lot going on, on the inside, sometimes ground beef, sometimes turkey; a sauce that was sweet and savory. The corner pieces were the best, crispy on the sides but it had the best part-the cheese. Scoured by the knife when it's cut, the cheese always ran to the corner pieces.

He liked the corner pieces, he always asked for them and she always obliged him. But now he saw it and he thought of her-he was mad at her. He pushed the plate away, not wanting to think about corner pieces or his mother. "Is it true?" Or perhaps he did.

The pirate also had a corner piece, lots of cheese-lots of good stuff; he could handle it. Mouth open and jaw corked to the side, he stabbed his piece and shrugged. "I like ships-Do you like ships?"

Awkward at best, but he had nothing else to say. Too smart for his own good, the boy leaned back cockily for his response. "I sailed your _ship-_it's small."

Killian's eyes flicked up, fork working at the middle of his lasagna as if to dismember it from the inside. "You don't get to have an opinion ." The phone rang. "I've been alive for centuries-you my boy? A wee decade-" He smirked at the smiled tugging at the boy's features as he jumped down from the island. "You're just a minnow in this sea.." He reached over and patted his arm before making his way to the phone.

"One of my Mom's is the Evil Queen, and the other is the Savior..My grandparents are The Dark One, The Queen of Hearts, Snow White and Prince Charming...You're a one handed pirate with a limp-I'd say you're the minnow."

Hook paused, icing the burn he just received from a child centuries his junior. Before his pride was hurt, a laugh bounced from the walls and he pointed his hook as his hand reached for the house phone. "I hurt my leg-it's healing-Aye-Hello?" He grinned into the receiver, a grin that faded when a frazzled cricket came across the line.

X

The onset of anxiety was slow, simmering almost. It was evident in presence but it took a while to make a show. First she opened her eyes to a blur unfamiliar to her semi-conscious state. Then she swallowed, her throat bristling against it's dry walls. The blur began to clear into a white tiled ceiling that unsettled her and when she reached-She couldn't reach. She could lift her hands but three inches before they were pulled back down by the handcuffs that trapped her.

The last time that she didn't know where she was, that she was restrained and lacked the power or energy to help herself was a time when she was at the mercy of those whose only endeavor was to hurt her. Writhing in her anger, turning to the glass to see wolves and dwarfs, the panic set in.

First anxiety, then it morphed into panic as the loss of freedom was amplified by each second she was held by cuffs she had no affiliation with. She was lying in a hospital bed restrained by handcuffs on both sides with nothing but the beating of her heart to tell the seconds that went by. "Let me go." It was a whisper that brought a red haired cricket into view. "Unhand me." Weak were the pleas, arms thrashing up to relieve herself but it just made the seconds of her heart beat faster. "L-Let me go."

She could hear footsteps, a herd of them crashing against the linoleum. The door slammed against the wall when it opened and her wrists thrashed once more. "Is this really necessary?" It's him, he's yelling but she can't tell who he's yelling at. Finally a face that she doesn't want to obliterate, a face that calms her, that slows the seconds down.

"Let me go." His eyes are soft as her wrists rise and fall once again. If he could ring the man that did this to her, he would but he's not there. If he could unlock them, he would but hadn't the key to do so. Without much to work with, the one handed pirate with a limp soothed the Queen as best he could, passing a hand over her hair as she calmed from the contact.

"Love...You went to see the cricket." She nodded into the pillow behind her. "You were upset and you had a spill-You're okay.." He pressed his lips to the side of her head, thankful that her wrists neither rose nor fell. "You're both okay." At that mention, her wrists thrashed again and he brushed against her hairline as she tried in vain to free herself.

"I don't-I don't want..to be here." The pirate nodded empathetically, eyes ablaze when he saw the cricket just standing there as if his feet were glued to the floor.

"Did you not hear her? Are you deaf or just plain incompetent-" He stopped, leaning away from the glass, from the onlookers. Why wasn't she using magic-she could free herself and they could go, they could just leave. But no, the little sarcastic boy she made a promise to was more important. The cricket ran out the door, but he didn't know if it was out of fear or he was really going to get who did this to her.

_Clink_

"Regina love-"

_Clink_

"The more you do that.."

_Clink_

"The angrier you get..."

_Clink_

"Regina." Her only response was her heart beat-The seconds were faster, her seconds were faster and his solutions were limited to the sweet whispers that he could mumble in her ear.

"Welcome to our turf your Majesty." Whale; He wore a wicked smile, triumphant that he had the Queen at his mercy, submitted by hand cuffs she refused to break. "I've spoken with Mary Margaret and David about your condition; exhaustion and dehydration complicated by-"

"You're pregnant?" The door swung open once again and in came the pair that they had stood toe to toe with just 24 hours before.

"It's called..." Her head rose from her pillow, wrists raising with her. "..confidentiality." Her head fell back. "Someone needs to let me go..."

"That's for our safety-"

"Charming I can tell you right now-Restraining someone who has been restrained and tortured before is not in the best interest of your _safety._"

"Regina-we need to talk about this.."

"Talk about what? I'm not Emma-I'm not a teenager, I'm not unprepared, I may feel-" _Clink _"-like I'm in jail but it's my prerogative if I-we wish to bring a child into this world-"

"A child born of a murderous pirate and an evil sorceress-Regina that child has no place in this world." The room fell quiet, no wrists thrashing and no speaking. The seconds were slow, torturous even, filled with nothing more than loaded stares and plotted thoughts. It is one thing to know what will happen and still have hope of the latter but an entirely different situation when the indignant truth is standing before you in a peacoat and a beret.

"You are not good." She swallowed thickly, the seconds coming faster. "You took everything-You took Daniel-"

"Why does it always come back to Daniel-"

"Because it does! It is ABOUT Daniel-"

"Your mother-"

"You fail to take responsibility for your actions." Her words fell like a mantra from her mouth, leaving the White Queen to scoff. "You killed my mother and you act like it's just a washable stain on your coat-You took a _life."_ Snow's eyes fell on hers. "You don't get to judge me-you don't get to tell me how to live my life and you have absolutely no right to my children-Henry, this child-No right whatsoever."

"Regina this baby poses a threat-"

"Shut up!" She silenced Charming with mere words of simple fashioning. At the sight of her breaking, the pirate stepped forward with good intent. "When I came here from Neverland, a few members of my crew came along with me for the journey-They were cursed here but all it takes is a phone call from ol' Captain Jones and they'll show-A seaman's loyalty. So how about you let the Queen go and we'll be out of your hair?"

"Are you threatening us?" It fell on bad ground.

He shrugged, a smug smirk on his face. "Merely suggesting what's in the best interest of _your safety." _Throwing their words back at him, he came face to face with his opposite.

"We're not afraid of you."

"And you see there mate-there lies the problem." He tapped his hook at his shoulder and Charming backed away instinctively, swiping at his hand. "Because we're not afraid of you either-Now two fearless groups of people, pirates and witches against werewolves and dwarfs-it's not going to be pretty aye?" Hook lifted a brow. "Don't push me."

David leaned into his wife. "We don't want pirates roaming the streets-destroying the town."

She nodded, looking towards Regina. _Clink _"We'll let you go for now but we'll be getting reports from Dr. Whale after your monthly visits-"

"I'm not coming back here." Her voice was weak and hoarse, aggravated by the prospect. "To be made a fool-to be held captive." Her wrist rose once again, futile in an attempt to detach from the bed. "You say that like I should trust you-like you've done anything at all to warrant my trust."

"Regina, we could have killed you.." His whisper is taunting as he releases her other hand from the handcuffs and she is released, but feels more bound then before. To feel like dead weight on the Earth, with people literally awaiting your last breath. It doesn't matter how hard you try, how far you travel the path of redemption-they'll never see you.

Her mind is different, complex in it's workings. So unique that she sees the siver lining in their hypocrisy, their badgering. The more they hassled her the more they became like her. Where's Henry." An instant change of subject lead to silent glares.

"We're getting him back as we speak-Emma's over at your house-" She was silent, meeting eyes with her better half, silently receiving assurance that the Sheriff would fail in her conquest. "What do you know?" Charming stopped short of uncuffing her completely, only releasing one hand. "Where is Henry?"

Regina rolled her eyes and Charming drew his sword. A mistake of epic proportions that ended in him being thrown against the wall and dwarfs storming the room. "You want to earn a hook in the side of your neck-Pull a sword on her again and I make no promises that you'll see the morrow." The seconds came faster and the blur returned, the white tile above her becoming a sea of light and the ruckus became white noise. Dwarfs rescued their Prince and retained the angry pirate, but she could tell none of this.

The only thing that she could make out was a blonde man with a crooked smile hovering over her as she faded from consciousness once more, her stay to be inevitably lengthened.

X

This time when her eyes opened, it was his eyes that she saw, his eyes that calmed her. _Clink. _But she was still cuffed, bound to the bed by her left hand, eerily watched around the clock. The dwarfs and the werewolves took turns in the room as if she had the power to slay the town in a state of unconsciousness.

"Here." He offered her a cup of water, the bended straw dangling in her direction. She eyed the werewolf at the foot of her bed and he shook his head to assure her.

"I poured it myself." Her eyes remained on the werewolf and he took a swig from the straw, as if to show her that it was not dangerous or poison. She eyed him closely, muttering something about '_backwash' _and he gave up, knowing that the IV would keep her hydrated.

Her head lolled against her pillow, wanting nothing more than to disappear into a haze of smoke, to be as invisible as they wanted her to be. A shaky exhale was all he needed to tell him that she was struggling, that she needed a distraction. The Captain set the cup of water down and began to discard his rings onto the end table. He unlatched his hook and straightened his shoulders. "Move over, love."

She inched over in the uncomfortable twin bed, smiling inwardly as he awkwardly squared himself next to her, all the while adjusting his pants and the collar of his shirt.

Her head found his chest to be a comfortable pillow, his presence being something that slowed the seconds and eased her nerves. If she was going to be held against her will then she figured it might as well be as she laid against the man she loved.

"Let's see..." He tilted his chin up, thinking of something to take her mind off of the fact that she was handcuffed to the bed by one hand, on 24 hour surveillance and a werewolf was now giving them an incredulous look as if what they did was so strange.

"Ah-I went to see the bug the other day..."

"His name is Archie." Ruby supplemented, barging in on their conversation.

"When the bloody hell did I ask you?" He cut back, flicking his hand at her as if she were a minuscule aspect of reality. "You're a watchdog-_literally_." She scoffed, not noticing the Queen's smirk at his annoyance and the surfacing of his thick accent.

"As I was saying love-I went to see _the bug _the other day.."

_"Captain Jones, I have to say-I'm a bit surprised to see you here so soon after our last session." Archie sat down on the recliner opposite the green couch that the Captain sat on, obviously uncomfortable and nervous. "So," he positioned his notepad in his lap, "What can I help you with today?"_

_"Henry's staying with us." He stated, exhaling as if he had been waiting to say those four words since he made the decision to walk to Dr. Hopper's office._

_"I heard-David says that you and Regina removed him from his home-"_

_"Home is where his mother is-and he's there now." Killian cut him off immediately, waving his hook in the air. "Any matter-this isn't about them."_

_"You got your hook back?" The cricket questioned, noting the sharp point it bared."_

_"I told you that I had to protect her." _

_"And that's how you plan on going about it-violence?"_

_"You've felt helpless before, haven't you cricket?"_

_He attempted to ignore the nickname, memories fading to his beaten ego and diminished character when pick-pocketing was a family business and he was at the mercy of his parent's beck and call. "Y-Yes, yes I have."_

_"Then you should understand the need to protect those you love from what you've once felt helpless against." Their eyes met with a silence and the cricket felt himself beginning to agree before he found that it was not a friend to friend conversation. He had to be a conscience, guidance._

_"Not through violence-"_

_"Then you mate-you have failed to experience true helplessness." His eyes averted at the memory of Mila's heart casting to the wind in grayed ashes. "Because only then will you truly understand the saying-'By any means necessary."_

_The man was getting tense, beginning to shut down. Before Archie lost him to the wallpaper or the lines in the carpet, he decided to change the subject. "So Henry-How are you two getting along?"_

_"Smashing." The pirate gave him a false smile that was masking what he really came for, what he really wanted to talk about._

_"Hook, why are you here?"_

_"My name is Captain Killian Jo-"_

_"I-I'm sorry-Captain Jones, why are you here?"_

_Captain Jones shifted on the couch, eyes casting down in thought. "Henry."_

_"But I just asked you about Henry and-"_

_"You asked me if we'd been getting along-And I told you, he's a great boy-Reminds me so much of his mother... a sarcastic little..." He paused, chuckling as he thought of the short conversations that he had been privy to and the undeniable resemblance he bared to his mother, personality and all._

_"Then what's the issue?" He probed, hoping to get to the root of the issue."_

_The pirate scratched the side of his face that was lined in stubble, pricking against his fingers. "His father." Knowing that they liked to interrupt each other, Dr. Hopper allowed the pirate to fill his own gaps and pauses. "We crossed paths in Neverland-I was going to use him to kill the Crocodile but..." He stopped, rubbing the curve of his hook against the fabric of his pants. "Mila...She wanted to go get him, to go back for him." His shoulders rose and fell. "She died before we could-" The harder his hook rubbed, the more frequent the pauses. "I-I offered him a family-I-I wanted to care for him."_

_"Captain-"_

_"I went about it the wrong way-He knew that I was just a pirate wishing to kill his father but I did-I did want..." Killian was never one for being inarticulate but this subject proved to be one of great difficulty. He always wondered if he had stumbled upon Bae with different intents, around a different time-perhaps his proposition wouldn't have been turned down._

_"How has it felt-being in the house with Henry and Regina?" He was digging for the connection._

_The pirate's eyes shined but he would never admit that; any possibility of the shine coming to fruition was non-existent. He pursed his lips unconsciousness, fiddling with the rings on his fingers. "It felt like something I hadn't-It was.."_

_"A family perhaps?" The cricket added, jotting down notes on his yellow notepad._

_Killian nodded. "Perhaps."_

_"Is that a fear of yours-A family? You're afraid you'll mess up or you won't protect them or that Henry-he won't accept you for your past...like his father?" When he met the pirate's eyes, he knew that they were one in the same-The Captain and the Queen. The fear for lack of protection, the fear of a family that they want but are not sure they can have. Afraid to touch something with fear that it may fall apart, that it might not even be real._

_They were both hesitant, untrusting._

_Killian knew what comradery was, what loyalty was-but family. True family, what he wanted with Mila but never was able to have. What he had a chance at having with Regina but was too fearful to accept it._

_To his question, to his fear, the pirate merely shrugged his shoulders. "Perhaps."_

With one hand cuffed to the side of the bed, she could do no more than nod against his chest. She wasn't mad that he went to go see Archie, especially with how she felt about him at the moment-More so, she was confused at his hiding of the matter.

"I know what you're thinking love-'_Killian dear, why didn't you tell me?'"_ He mocked her and she gave him a weak smile.

"That's not what I sound like." He chuckled, bringing a little joy to his heart with the knowledge that he got her to smile. "Why didn't you tell me?" She asked, quickly switching the gears.

"Tell you what-Why I went?"

"No, about how you felt." Her eyes rose to his, wishing that he had shared his thoughts with her, especially since he didn't fear the idea of a family alone; she was afraid too.

"I just did, didn't I?"

"Killian." She called his name, too tired for his antics.

"Love-I don't know, I just..."

"You didn't want to?"

"Simply put." His shoulders relaxed against the pillow and she sunk into the contours of his body, exhaustion hitting her with a second round.

"That's understandable." With a nod of her head, she closed her eyes for what seemed like seconds before they snapped open once more. "Where's Henry?" At the mention, she felt him tense against her and she lifted her head. "Killian-"

"I let him stay at the ship-"

"By himself?!"

"Yes by himself-he was fine until the werewolf sniffed him out and rendered your cloaking spell useless." He cut his eyes at Ruby, sitting in the corner seemingly un-phased by his mention.

The seconds came faster at the realization that Henry was once again with Emma and the two idiots against his will. Seeing the turmoil affect her features, he pressed a kiss to her forehead and pulled her closer. "Are you sure you don't want to get us out of here?" Ruby's ears perked up. "You fixed my hand-You jumped from the house to the bug's office-"

"No-no, he's already angry with me because of it, I don't need magic-I don't want magic, I have no use for it-"

"Okay, okay.." He nodded, deciding not to press the subject as his arm held her closer. "Then tomorrow, tomorrow-I'll get you out of this retched place and you'll have your boy." He paused, vowing to protect a family that was real to him, that he wouldn't let fall apart.  
"By any means necessary."

**TBC**


	7. The Fallout

She awoke to the sounds of metal clanking against metal, occasionally with a ginger pass along her skin. Hazed eyes opened momentarily to see the Captain hard at work, the point of his hook brazing against the cuff that bound her. When the clank sounded and the metal hit the floor, she lifted her wrist slowly, fingers rounding the sore skin from rubbing against such an unpleasant metal. Groggy, with remnants of slumber still lingering over her, she watched as he kept watching the wolf that slept in the corner, obviously failing at her job.

Noticing her distress, he passed his good hand over her face in an effort to calm her. "Do you trust me love?" It was a soft whisper that was expressed more by his eyes than the words themselves. She nodded, hissing at the bare spot where her IV had been. "I read your chart-the nursemaid, or whatever she is-She said you're fine to go home, that you'll be fine." He was assuring her, making sure she knew that all was well medically and their only hurdle was to leave.

He stood, motioning silently to a red capped timid man. He came in quickly, looking around the room as Killian pointed to the closet. "Get the bag Smee."

He nodded, grabbing the bag containing the queen's clothes. "Aye aye Captain."

"Shut up Smee!" He scorned in a harsh whisper upon seeing the wolf stir at his assistant's voice.

"Aye aye Captain." He spoke in the same tone, grabbing the bag and handing her coat to his superior.

"Smee!"

"Sorry Cap-" He clamped his mouth shut, getting the side eye from his Captain as he tip-toed out of the room.

Killian scowled, snatching the coat back before turning back to Regina, who was as quiet as he had ever seen her. He chocked it to discernment, knowing when to speak and when not to. He was handling it, and she didn't have to do anything but comply. "It's a little chilly outside." He placed a hand on her back to sit her up, surprised at how spent she was when her body leaned into him instinctively. Arm by arm, he put her coat on. "There's no time to get dressed completely-the sun's almost up and the dwarfs are early risers."

He went to button her up and she fanned his hand away. "I can do it." She deflated against the bed, fingers working away. He cared, something that he didn't always show. Seeing the look on his face, she smiled weakly, her voice rasping out a dry quip. "I _am_ the one with two hands, remember?"

He nodded, his hook curved behind his back as his hand brushed her hair from her face, looking her over as if she were close to breaking, fragile. Her chin lifted by the fraction, using her voice to steer him away but remain at a whisper. "What's your plan?"

"You needn't worry love, just enjoy the ride." He smiled, easing his hand under her knees so that she knew to lift them. When he got enough room, he positioned his hook on the other side of her as his other hand supported her back and lifted her from the creaking gurney. "My hook, if you please." She took hold of it by the curve, turning until it clicked in response, disjointing from his leather mount. "Wouldn't want to injure you."

It was quite a sight as Smee held the door open, his Captain with the Queen in his arms, clutching his hook to her chest. In the halls, were men dressed in all types of getups, some security guards, others-motorcyclists, there were even a couple suits.

"Love, meet my crew-or part of my crew, the part you cursed." Her eyes flew up at him accusingly and he smirked, beginning to walk through the filter of men with them filing behind him. "Oh, they don't hold it against you. They enjoyed a wee break from the pirate's life." They walked down the corridor quietly, passing the waiting room occupied by the dwarfs who were 'standing guard' while asleep, Snow and Charming having long gone home.

"And ye ol' Captain's abuse, aye?" One of the former pirates, clad in ripped jeans and a checkered bandanna nudged one of his fellow shipmates. The group mumbled in agreement and Killian hushed them, scorning their jokes.

"Let them have their fun, dear." Regina mumbled, preserving the little voice she had left.

"Yes, let us have our fun DEAR!" One of them piped up from the men and they cackled and hummed their laughs, kidding around as if they were still sailing the great seas.

"HU-" The Captain's hushing of his crew was halted when a hostile dwarf spoke up from behind him.

"What the hell is going on?" Killian and his men turned around to see Grumpy with his arms crossed as a few more dwarfs awoke and joined him. "Snow and her Prince didn't release her yet." He motioned at the back of the crowd where the Queen was held up in the Captain's arms.

The Captain quirked his brow, surprised that the Queen said nothing, watching the standoff occur. "Skully."

The biker with all the jokes stepped forward, supported by his fellow mates. "You don't see nothing."

Grumpy recoiled, crossing his arms over his chest. "What?"

"Captain and his lady are gonna walk outta here and you-you don't see nothing." He neared him, distracting the shorter man as the rest of the crew made off with Killian and Regina towards the exits. "And if you do-You're not gonna do nothing."

"Oh yeah?" Grumpy poked out his chest, rallying his guys.

Skully stepped aside, revealing that they were gone, a triumphant smirk playing on his face. He bent down defiantly, tipping off Grumpy's hat. "Yeah."

Killian ushered himself into the black sedan that was waiting for him, pulling her into his lap as the driver sped away at the close of the door. It was all sudden and rushed, with new faces all along the way. "That's Bones." Killian gestured at the man behind the wheel, dressed similar to Skully.

"Where we goin' Captain?"

She rolled her eyes at the situation, being escorted by pirates to break out of a hospital. Well, she did choose Captain Killian Jones-She got chivalry, brash diction and an army of pirates. She chose him-

She chose a Captain;

And he chose a Queen.

As soon as he got her home, she was out like a light for the rest of the day. He thought, perhaps, that the exhaustion didn't completely hit her until she got in her own bed, beneath her own sheets. She snored through an entire day, something that he would taunt her about later, sleeping in peace without a worry or a care. That's all she needed really, to weed the stress out of her life if only for a day-just a day.

"Henry?" She was coming to, finally, attempting to sit up as he pressed the back of his hand to her head.

"You almost ran a fever last night-Thought I might have to take you back to that horrid place." It was a statement that ignored her question, punctuated by the offering of water, one of the only things that he would wake her up for during her extended slumber.

She sipped from the glass briefly, earning a glare from the Captain that sat beside her legs, coaxing her to drink the whole glass. She complied, setting it aside when finished, her one-track mind going back to her son. "They still have him, don't they?"

He nodded reluctantly and she slipped back under the covers, feeling a chill pass through her. He sighed, not wanting her to close off because of a setback. "We'll get him back love, I'm sure it's just a matter of time."

She scoffed softly, eyes closing as she turned on her back. "If he wanted to-He would come." She swallowed, wishing for another glass of water as the dryness rendered her hoarse. "He's left this house plenty of times without my knowledge-He's smart, he knows how to leave...If he wanted to."

She caught her beau smiling and nearly smacked his chest, incredulous at his reaction. "Don't fret love, I'm not laughing at you."

"Oh?"

"I'm being earnest with you-I have my men watching their apartment." He cleared his throat, diddling his fingers in the direction of the window as if to signal the Charming home. "He's tried to climb out the window twice but he was stopped once by Swan and another time by Skully-The faux Prince ran outside and retrieved him before Skully and Bones could bring him over-"

He paused, seeing the shine in her eyes. It pained him to see her well up at the actions of others, upsetting herself even the more. She inhaled shakily, never exhaling as she shook her head vigorously. "Breathe love."

"I can't live like this." That was her exhale, her admission-what she had been avoiding since the very beginning. "Henry shouldn't have to live like this." The tears ran down her face and she thumbed them away quickly, her breath coming in waves as she accepted what had long been banned from her train of thought. "Jumping out of windows...running away-He's twelve years old, he shouldn't be running anywhere."

His hand cupped her face, hoping to bring solace to her rising upset. She settled at his touch, meeting his eyes. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying," She nubbed her fists into the bed, pushing herself to sit up as she sniffled and fought back the tears she desperately wanted to cry. "We need to talk."

X

After their discussion, she jumped in the shower-sullen but standing by their decision. She was still exhausted but she couldn't stay in a bed any longer, despite the apparent need. And he didn't push her, going downstairs to test his oven skills. For him it was the adversary, something to conquer-this hot contraption as he called it. She taught him how to use it, but seeing how he was focused on the dress she had worn rather than the words she spoke-this could turn out to be disastrous.

Before anything could implode into flames, the phone rang and he was all too happy to answer it. "Aye-Hello?"

_"Operation Crocodile-Are you prepared?"_ A sketchy voice came across the dial, a distracting crackle breaking up the connection.

"Hello?"

_"It's time to set sail-Are you prepared?" _

"If this is a joke, it isn't funny."

_"Hook, seriously?" _He dropped the act, returning to his normal voice.

"Aye, Henry my boy-I thought Swan had you below deck."

_"She did but I'm ready to walk the plank-I don't want to be here."_

"Don't walk the plank lad-Your mum and I'll come for you when she's feeling better."

_"You don't understand-I have to leave now, I need to talk to her."_

"About what?"

_"That's classified information Captain..."_

"Is that code for something or..."

_"I can't tell you."_

The pirate paused, contemplating whether or not she would be more angry for letting Henry stay when he could leave or letting him jump out of window to hitch a ride with a couple of pirates. "Aye-lad, you remember the rugged fellow you met when you tried to escape-"

_"How'd you know that?"_

"See, you don't know everything."

_"Minnow."_

"That anyway to address a Captain?"

_"You're not a Captain unless you have a ship, a crew on your ship and you're in the middle of the sea. Until then-No Captain."_

"The bloody-I am a Captain."

_"We'll debate this later-Right now I need to get outta here. They're taking turns watching me and right now it's Gramps' turn. He fell asleep and I have my rope ready-"_

"Why are you calling me if you have your plan all figured out?"

_"Your crew-they're good guys?"_

He paused, giving an honest answer. "They can be."

_"They'll take me straight to the house?"_

"Just tell them where to go." The end of his sentence left off with the dial tone. He wondered if he had gotten caught or it was on purpose-he'd find out sooner or later. In the meantime, he could figure out how to work the oven so that he could make some tea-And if all else failed, he'd probably just microwave the water. Staring at the coils for a bit, he made up his mind-He'd just microwave the water.

Before he could begin messing with the other appliances, the doorbell sounded throughout the house and the Captain completely expected an entourage coming to confront him and the Queen over their impromptu escape. Taking his time in 'jeans', something new he was trying out that were oddly comfortable, he came to the door only to see that it was not an entourage-but the bug.

"Cricket..." He announced, looking him over as his hands held the doorway. "What brings you here?"

Archie smiled, motioning towards the door. "May I come in?" He dipped his head as if to respect the man he stood before, respect his position and his fault in the drama as of late.

"That depends on your answer to the question I already asked mate-What brings you here?"

He opened his mouth for a rebuttal but clamped it shut, knowing that he wouldn't get passed the pirate without giving him the answer that he sought. "Regina-She and I didn't get to finish our session and after that episode in the hospital-I feel that we should talk."

"About?"

Archie huffed, wishing he didn't have to go into such detail. "Everything-I just don't want Regina to do anything rash out of anger-At first she seems fine and then she'll think about it-what happened, what was said." He shrugged, hoping to get through to him. "I don't want her to snap and do something she might regret, especially when her and Henry are on such a great path to reconciliation."

The Captain pondered Archie's words, knowing all to well that the reality of what she had been put through might not have hit her yet. The anger hit her in increments, it builds overtime, it stews in her core until she has no choice but to curse a whole slew of kingdoms. Killian stepped aside and opened the door for the makeshift therapist, allowing him to step into the foyer. "Wait here." He lifted his hook, unintentionally threatening to the now recoiling cricket. Killian smiled sheepishly, raising his hand instead. "Sorry about that mate."

Archie nodded as the pirate walked up the steps, and not long after disappearing behind the walls-a shut door climaxed his exit.

"Regina, love?"

"I'm in the closet." He suspected as much, walking in the closet to find her holding out a sheath dress to wear. With a roll of his eyes, he took the hanger and put the garment back with her dresses, stretching his hook to her pants before handing her a pair of leggings, the curve of the hanger dangling on his hook. "It was a lovely dress."

"And as lovely as it is-we're not going anywhere, no need to walk around in a dress just so I can tear it off of you." He wriggled his eyebrows and she snorted softly, shaking her head at his candor.

"I do want to get Henry-I just don't want him to be somewhere that he doesn't want to-He was miserable with me...he shouldn't have to live like that." Before he could offer any comforting words, she turned around, tucking the towel that wrapped around her body from bosom to thigh. "Who was at the door?"

"Oh..." He held her arm with his hand, running his fingers up and down her skin. "Your hair is longer love-It's rather nice." He referenced her half dry, have wet mane, flicking it with his hook.

She tilted her head to the side, eyes squinting with disbelief that he actually believed that she would buy that. "Don't make me ask twice."

"The bug." Her face contorted from confusion to rage in all of a few seconds, his hand having to dart out to keep her from leaving the closet. "He just wants to talk, possibly apologize-"

"No-NO!" Her voice strained to a rasp, damaging the little voice that she had gained from her rest. "I don't want to see him-Get him out of my house." She snatched a garment from the rack and stormed away, laying her clothes out on the bed.

"Regina-"

"I trusted that chirping bastard and he betrayed me AGAIN." She turned around to walk towards her dresser.

"He's sorry-"

"He's an idiot-that's what he is, an insect with a PhD that I-" she laughed dryly "I gave him-granted it was through a curse but he's not complaining."

"He just wa-"

"He just wants to what?!" Her voice was borderline venomous, rasping at every pitch and octave. She spun around, slamming the open drawer shut so her anger had action. Because he knew her, because he was her better half-he saw passed the rage, the anger-he saw her bottom lip quiver in protest to the shining in her eyes. She had trusted the bug, considered him a friend even. And he did let her down, once again reinforcing her thought that truly-truly there was no good in the world.

"Okay..." He walked over to the dresser, "I'll tell him to go.."

"No-I'll do it." Flustered and angry, she snatched her clothes from the bed and stomped into the bathroom, figuring that the bug might've been right-her anger is processed and he was just catching the beginning.

X

The pirate and the cricket sat in silence at the dining room table, staring at the staircase, waiting to hear footsteps descending. When she did come downstairs, her presence was unannounced-slowly descending the stairs in preparation of what she was fit to to call, a battle. He had betrayed her not once, not twice but three times. And now he sat at her dinning room table as though they were supposed to be on speaking terms.

"What could possibly posses you to think that I would want to listen to what you have to say, much less, speak to you as if you were my Doctor?" Her mind had trouble fathoming the process that others go through when approaching her. It seems that they know what not to do, what not to say and when not to say it and yet all that occurs is what she doesn't want-What angers her.

She didn't want to be sitting in front of him and he could tell that from the mere intent of her stare. It wasn't intimidating as much as it was a wishing for him to go away. The longer she stared, the smaller he felt-provided that she was a Queen, he assumed that it was a look that she had given her subjects. His assumption however proved just how far and just how little they had come; he still didn't know her.

"I am in no need for your _expert _advice; contrary to what others might believe, you are in no position to regard yourself as such-Curse or not, Your voice of reason, of conscience, has failed you..." It had also failed the ounce of faith that she had placed in him. "And I want no part of it."

She moved to leave the table and he held out his hand, raising from his seat by a fraction. "Your majesty," she paused at a name that she had since parted with, barely able to recall the last time he addressed her in formal order. "...please reconsider my offer. Just a few hours to clear things up-That's all I ask. I understand how..difficult things may be but you've made such progress.

She scoffed audibly. "Such progress that you consciously chose not to relay to Snow and her Prince."

"Your majesty please...think of your future-your children's future-If you don't feel like you can trust me-I can offer my being left with nothing but an umbrella to cover my head as collateral-Just please, hear me out."

She turned her head, seeming to not accept what he was offering. She was hurt, more sensitive then he gave her credit for. He may have been a therapist but it was a cursed PhD after all, and he still couldn't differentiate her intimidation from the undercurrent of betrayal lying beneath.

"How about some apple cider?" Killian broke the silence, standing from his seat at the table before placing his hand on the bug's shoulder, encouraging him to stand as well. "Can crickets have apple cider?"

Archie sputtered with his answer as he was led out of the room, giving the Queen some much needed space to get over the offer that she was receiving, that she didn't want to take. It was baffling to her, that even the cricket didn't recognize her hurt. Perhaps she hadn't been clear, considering him a friend, a weary confidant. He knew things about her that the Captain could only see remnants of in her tears and sorrows. She trusted him and he betrayed her.

Again.

"Forgive him, love." Those three words pierced the atmosphere and she resisted the urge to roll her eyes at them

"Forgive Rumpelstiltskin." She mumbled, not willing to back down from her emotions without a fight.

"Bloody crocodile." He scorned beneath his breath, earning a knowing stare from his better half. "C'mon love, it's not the same-he's a cricket for God sakes." She turned her head, hearing none of it. "I love you."

"I love you too but I'm not going in there."

"Oh c'mo-I'll let you steer the Jolly Roger."

"I've been at the helm of a ship, it's not that pleasant-thank you but no."

"Love, everyone wants to sail the Jolly Roger-"

She stood, shaking her head. "As I last recall, my name is not Skully or Bones-" She yelped, their banter being interrupted by the pulling of her waist to his as he matched her stance and gave her no choice but to look at him.

He looked into her eyes, silently pleading with the unrelenting Queen. She feigned ignorance, picking at the invisible lint on hs shirt. "Yes, Captain?"

"The sooner you talk to him, the sooner he leaves."

"So that he can go back and report to the cardigan Queen?"

He chuckled, rearing his head back. "Is that what those horrid little jackets are called?

"Unfortunately so."

"Well then give them something good to talk about-Something that the Cricket can report to that cardigan Queen and her...her flannel Prince."

"But-" The doorbell rang and before she had a chance to register the ringing through the house, he was easing her towards the living room. She scowled and he smirked, backing away. "It won't kill you, love."

She huffed and turned around, slowly advancing towards the opposite couch of Dr. Hopper. Killian, seeing that she was pulled into the conversation, answered the door with full knowledge of who it might be. Creaking it open slowly, his guys honked the horn as they passed and Henry slid in the through the crack as the Captain closed the door quietly behind him. "Shh." He held Henry back so that Archie couldn't see who had arrived even if he leaned forward to do so.

"I told you that I couldn't go the hospital and you-"

"I was worried Regina, I was thinking of your best interest.-"

"She had me handcuffed to a bed and told me that my child was not needed in this world." She shook her head, angering herself with the memories of mere days before. "Were you worried about that? Was that in my best interest?" She shook her head, arms wrapped around herself. "First she takes says the son I've raised for ten years-" she scoffed "And you all just have such a..blind faith in her, so much so that no one sees my efforts-My own son doesn't believe in me anymore." She shrugged, still untrusting of the man that sat before her. "But then again, he hasn't believed in me for a long time now."

"That's not true..." She turned her head to see him standing in the doorway with a hesitant Killian standing behind him.

"Henry what are you doing here?" She stood and he ran from the doorway, wrapping his arms around her middle immediately.

"I need to talk to you." He looked from his mother to his former therapist, fear filling his eyes. "You can't tell them that I'm here."

Archie opened his mouth and the stare that he received was indeed that of intimidation; there was no confusing it's intent. Dr. Hopper nodded and Regina softened her expression, glad that he took the hint. "Dr. Hopper, would you mind if we continued this another time?" Honestly, she was glad to get out of having to talk any more; Henry was just a welcome distraction."

Despite wanting to protest, the cricket gathered his yellow pad and briefcase, leaving the pair alone as the Captain showed him to the door, smirking at the Queen's ability to get out of doing what she didn't want to do. Regina stayed behind, bending at the waist as Henry, obviously conflicted, stood in front of her, his book bag strap hanging lazily on his shoulder.

"Henry what's wrong?"

His answer baffled her.


	8. The Flames

_I'm soooooooooooo sorry for the wait. I'm guilty, I am! I neglected this fic and will try my best to get an update up at least every 5 days. This chap is a little angst/a little fluff. It's a bit shorter than the others but the usual length will resume next chapter when the sessions resume.I hope you enoy this chap, and trust me this is't the end. Our Captian and Queen still have some issues to figure out and work out between themselves-Hooked Queen foreva and eva! :) I'll fix typos that I don't see now tomorrow, way too tired lolol_

_-__**iiwasalwaysthequeen**_

He didn't have to wonder what went through her mind all the time, quite often he already knew. He knew that when she threw things it was good, that meant she wasn't keeping it bottled up, that she wasn't going to curse a couple kingdoms. Silence, however, was something to worry about, to be feared. That meant that she was planning something, that the cogs were turning and something was bound to happen.

She had barely said a word since Henry had spilled his small heart to her, conveying his worries and fears. She comforted him, assured him, and fed him-retreating to the bedroom for a moment of silence. She was processing it, dealing with it, trying not to explode with the knowledge of it. Honestly, sometimes she felt it was easier to rip their hearts out and walk over their dropped bodies. But it was a fleeting thought, because she knew that truly it wasn't-It wasn't worth the guilt, the memories, or the anger that never went away. It may have seemed easier but really it wasn't.

As tempting as it was.

_"They're gonna kill you."_

The words haunted her, spinning an endless mantra in her thoughts. She had angered them and now she must be dealt with, she must be done away with. She was disposable to those people, a mere means to an end for their happiness. As long as she exists, they cannot truly rest with themselves-And in that way, they are just like her, they are no better than her. Snow's existence mocked her, with every breath the girl drew, it was one the Queen lost. Now the tables were turned and apparently, her freedom bothered those who felt that their own liberties had ben stripped away.

"Knock, knock." His words were filtered clouds in her mind, in one ear and out the other. She heard nothing but her son's voice echoing in her mind, his soft sniffles as he told her what they had in store for her, what they planned to do with her life.

_"They're gonna kill you."_

"Love, you're supposed to answer, 'who's there'?" She was unresponsive, casting her glance to the hands that fiddled in her lap.

The voice that spoke was hoarse and worn. Tired of fighting for what was hers. She was tired of having to rip out hearts to be happy. She was tired of having to use magic to defend herself. She was tired of fighting those who seemed intent on seeing her fail. Obviously they were tired of fighting too, seeing only one solution as a way to end it all.

_"They're going to kill you."_

"Did Henry teach you that?"

Hand and hook behind his back, the sullen pirate walked into the bedroom that they shared, dipping his head in an attempt to see the face that turned away from him. "No, another lad-but no matter."

His tone is gentle, sensitive to her mood that seems to fill the atmosphere. Her only response to him is a sigh that he can barely hear, but speaks volumes to what she won't say. There is no shiny solution, nothing aesthetic about their options. Falling back into a comfortable plan of reason would involve her backsliding into ways that she had long abandoned, and that was something that she wasn't willing to do.

He sat beside her, giving a considerable amount of space between them. Her head turned by the slightest inclination, beckoning him over wordlessly. He followed suit, scooting over so that they were arm to arm, thigh to thigh. Her head found his shoulder as he moved his hand behind her, rubbing her back gently as a comfortable silence seemed to suit them. No expectations, no deliberations. Just silence.

The doorbell rang and she stiffened next to him, lifting her head at the intrusive sound.

"MOM! They're here!" The Queen shot up from the bed and the Captain's attempts to catch her failed. He decided to follow behind her as she marched down the stairs without a tinge of hesitation. Henry was standing in front of the door, looking up to see his mother coming down the stairs. "Mom-wait-"

She heard nothing but white noise, a static in her ears as she charged forward and opened her door without a second thought. There were dwarfs piling out of the back of his pick up truck carrying pick axes. Snow and her Prince stepped out with a Sword and a crossbow, their unarmed Savior in tow. They were ready for battle.

_"They're gonna kill you."_

"Someone forget to invite us to the party?" The yell was heard from a barbaric man clad in leather and denim, exiting his truck with similarly dressed fellows, arriving at just the right time. It was a showdown, a culmination of tensions. "We were keeping an eye on them like you asked-We followed them here." Bones yelled from the lawn as he crossed over to his Captain.

"Wait!" Henry ran down the path, standing in the midst of the familial drama. "It doesn't have to be this way.."

"Henry, move out of the way-She can't keep taking you from us." Emma extended her hand and Henry backed away into a soft surface. He looked up to see his mother standing behind him, her hands holding to his shoulders.

He shook his head gently, eyes filling with unshed tears. "She's not taking me-I'm going to her."

"Henry, c'mon-"

"I don't want to be with you anymore!" His words pierced her, sharp and without remorse. "Gramps and Snow are always fighting-You have dark magic and I can't remember the last time you went to bed sober."

"Henry." Regina tugged at his shoulder, knowingly despising the woman he was talking about but she knew it had to hurt to hear such things. She had heard it herself once before.

"Mom-they don't care about me over there.." He turned around, wiping his eyes. "It's always about you or the town or magic."

"Henry we love you." Snow defended, reaching out her hand.

He shook his head, backing up into his mother. "It's not enough anymore."

Appalled, the White Queen was in disbelief. "Henry they're having a baby-they won't have time for you."

"More time than you do." He didn't seem the least bit shocked by the news, leaning into his mother even the more. "I want to be with my mom."

At the words, Snow's arrows began to rattle in her sack, clanking against each other. Charming turned around, looking at his wife's back to see that her weapons seemed to have taken a mind of it's own. Without warning the few arrows she had shot up into the air and charged at the Queen and her son.

Killian ran forward and Regina pulled her son closer, one hand holding his head as another darted out and stopped them inches from her body, just having registered what was happening. The weapons fell to the ground and the crowd turned to Emma, trembling in her place, eyes trained on the woman that she had long sparred with.

"Emma what was that?" Charming whispered, asking even though he knew how little control his daughter had over her magic nowadays.

"Let's go." She spoke through gritted teeth, heading back to the pickup truck.

Snow grabbed her daughter's arm, not knowing if she heard her correctly. "What do you mean, let's go? They're taking Henry."

"You heard him!" She yelled through bloodshot eyes, tired of fighting the inevitable. "We let him down."

"Emma-"

"I'm giving him his best shot." Emma's words quieted her mother as it resonated with her that they no longer held a suitable place for him. She had to give him up.

Again.

The tight grip Henry had on her middle loosened considerably at Emma's concession. The blonde looked tired, tired of fighting and tired of losing. She turned back before getting in the truck, eyeing her son. "I love you Henry."

"I love you too." He responded, but never moved, his breath still coming in haggardly after being attacked by rogue arrows. David waived off the dwarfs and they huffed, turning back with their pick axes.

David and Snow began to ascend the path and Regina moved Henry behind her, nudging him towards Killian. Killian nudged him towards Bones and Bones took him inside, getting the message. This was no longer about Henry, this was about the adults in the situation and what Henry had overheard them discussing.

"I hope you can understand our premise." Snow spoke up, standing beside her Prince.

"Oh, you coming to attack my family with dwarfs and arrows? Very plausible mate." Captain Jones spoke up immediately, throwing a protective hand around Regina. She took kindly too his chivalry but stood as tall as he did-they were equals, they stood together. A united front.

"Honestly, that's not what concerns me." Regina deadpanned, meeting Snow's eyes. "What concerns me is the matter my son overheard you speaking of so callously."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"My execution..." Her stare fluttered over David cursively, the distaste clear in her eyes. "Or how our dear Prince Charming so eloquently put it, _'we have to kill her'_."

They stiffened considerably, internally grabbing their bearings as the stood before the Captain and his Queen; the Queen and her Captain. Snow was the first to speak up, clearing her throat beforehand. "You have to pay for your crimes... Some people have expressed their concern over you roaming the streets and living," her hand waived towards the white edifice, "...in such luxury, while they're still paying the price of your curse."

"That's a crock of-"

"Killian." Regina whispered, calming the man's retorting and settling his temper. If she wasn't going to get upset then he needn't either.

"Does my existence mock you?"

Snow wrinkled her brows, taken aback by the question. "I'm sorry?"

The fallen Queen's head titled to the side, curious as to the thoughts running through her former step daughter's mind. "My happiness, my ambivalence towards what you think-The fact that I'm finally getting the family I want and yours is falling apart...Does it mock you? So much so that you feel the need to kill me?"

Snow's eyes filled voluntarily and she was silent, actions that answered Regina's questions without much effort. "I don't know what you're talking about." Her voice was thick with emotion, clouded and unclear.

"If you try to kill me," she leaned forward, paying no attention to David as he took a step forward as well, "...you'll be just like me."

Killian intertwined his fingers with hers, steering her away from the confrontation as the pair stood stunned, leaving Snow White with no other choice but to wipe the solemn tear on her cheek. The Captain's pirates began to clear the premises and he pulled Regina inside, letting Bones out out of the house at the same time so that he could help Skully rid their lawn of dwarfs and princes.

Once inside, Regina found herself lip locked in a surprise embrace. She didn't fight it though, leaning into him as his hands roamed the curves of her body that he loved to sleep next to. "Mom!" The pair pulled away breathlessly with Regina turning away to flush the pink from her cheeks. "Can you guys like...keep it upstairs?"

She chuckled, nodding sheepishly as her blush subsided and he squeezed her hand, assuring her that all was well, even if it didn't seem like it...all was well.

X

"How do you feel?" His voice was gentle and quiet as they laid in their dim bedroom, his head propped against his elbow with Regina on her back.

"Honestly?" She turned her head to meet his eyes, begging the question with the tears that shined in them. "Anxious." The sentiment made his heart drop, saddened that even after letting her have Henry, they still refused to let her be in peace.

He extended his arm and she slid next to him as he rolled onto his back. Her head found his chest and the peace that had been taken from her was restored. Her fears were still very much alive, but her peace, her peace steadily came back with every beat of his heart.

"What if they really-" He stopped her from finishing the thought because she didn't have to think about that. He would never let that happen, even if he had to sail the Jolly Roger to a sea unheard of with her and Henry at the bow and him at the helm, they would never kill his Queen. His hand traveled to her side, thumbing gently at her stomach, only slightly distended.

He pulled away with a grin, pecking her once more before she inquired as to why his smile had grew so wide. He responded simply, as if she should have known all along. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For giving me a family." Without knowing his fears, she gave him a family, an expanding family. Feeling the curve of her stomach, he couldn't help but show her that she had gifted him beyond compare. "You've got a seaman's belly."

She giggled into his kiss, turning onto her side as so she could wrap her arms around his neck comfortably. "I beg your pardon?"

He kissed her before unwrapping from her hold, eliciting a small pout from her as they lost contact. He grabbed a pillow from behind himself so that she would have something to lay on as he propped himself up beside her. "May I seek something of you, my Queen?" He asked, haughtily pitching his voice in mock of a noble approaching her court.

"Yes you may, dear Captain." Her voice was like velvet, sultry in presence and smooth on the ears. Just hearing it made him capture her lips once more, knowing that she didn't mind as she hummed contently into his kiss. He pulled away reluctantly ans she exhaled, lifting a brow. "You come to beseech my court and instead you attempt to bed me? How sinfully inappropriate."

"It's that voice." He met her lips again, between intervals. "I can't concentrate."

"Am I distracting you, Captain Jones?" The way his title rolled off of her tongue made him come at her quicker, tugging at her waist to pull her closer.

She squealed into his kiss, smirking when she realized what she could reduce him to with the mere dropping of an octave. He rolled over her, lifting himself up so that he sat on his knees, straddling her legs. "You know love, you just made a lovely family moment, very very sexy."

"Oh?"

"I'd say you're the one who is being inappropriate."

"Is that so?"

He laughed at her, widening his eyes as he attempted to convey the truth. "Yes! I was appealing your court to ask you for something."

"What?"

"My hand!" She waved her own and his leather jag was replaced with the forearm he knew and his fingers wriggled at the sight.

"May I ask why you sought your hand?"

He pressed a finger to her lips, shaking his head as he fell weak to her sultry voice. "Love.." He warned playfully and she hummed beneath his finger, feigning innocence. "I wanted to be able to do..." His hands worked at her night gown top, opening the last three buttons to expose her abdomen. "..this.." His hands moved against the expanse of her stomach and he grinned, chuckling under his breath. "A seaman's belly."

"What?"

"Look." He inclined her to look at the round hill that was now her stomach, the bump that housed their child. "You're round now." He laughed, loving that she had finally popped and he could see her grow swollen with their child. However his laughter died upon seeing her face. Her eyes welled with tears that he didn't understand, that he thought he was responsible for. "What is it, love? Did I hurt you-"

She shook her head vigorously, gasping as she finally lost control of the tears in her eyes. She sobbed openly and he was confused, worried that he might've done something to cause such an emotional outburst. He sat down beside her, running a hand over her back to soothe her as she sat up in distress. "We're having a baby." He made out the words passed her cries and his concern was lifted.

She was fine, only coming to terms that while she had given him a family, he had given her a baby. The reality of it all brought her to tears, something that they'd probably discuss in their next session. For now, he could only hold her as she dispelled her tears and let the emotions of the day run free. All was well..

..for now.


	9. The Factors

_Sorry! Writer's block monster and this is a short chapter, I know but I just wanted to get something out as soon as the WB lifted because it's been such a long break. Again, I apologize and hope that you all continue to read and review. The next chap will definitely be longer :) I'll fix typos later since it's so early ;)_

_**-iiwasalwaysthequeen **_

"No more babies after this." She winced as he tried his best to be gentle with her, unzipping her boots as her legs laid on his lap.

"You know love, it's due to short dresses like the one you're wearing that we're in this predicament." She cut her eyes in his direction and he shrugged with a smirk. Her expression lost all malice, real or faux, when he pulled the boots from her feet, her very tender and swollen feet.

She pressed her head back against the couch cushion in relief, fiddling her fingers over the modest bump between them. "It was longer before I started renting space to your seed." He chuckled, seeing that she was completely serious and eyeing him as though he was completely culpable.

"How was the lad on your morning walk?" He pressed a thumb into the sole of her foot and she hummed in approval, smiling when he looked up to meet her eyes.

"He has a substitute teacher, Mrs. Tremaine, and he tried to talk me into letting him stay home." She shook her head at his defenses, stating his case until the school bus actually pulled away with him on it. "He may not like her but he has to deal with her. You can't run away from your problems."

"Or curse entire lands." His comment was met by a pillow that she pulled from her side and threw at his face. "It's a lesson we all have to learn love."

"Keep talking and you'll never see your hook again," she teased before enunciating his title, "Captain."

He lifted a brow as he continued to massage her foot. "Oh, we both now the real reason why I haven't gotten my hook back is that two hands," he found a pressure point ans smiled when the relief overtook her features, "...are better then one."

He continued to work on the spot that seemed to pose the most comfort for her before moving to the other foot to find the same point. She was doing fine until he hit a certain spot and she let out a light laugh that was short lived, seeing as he stopped moving at the sound.

"What's so funny?" He smirked, expecting to hear her thought but she just shook her head, cheeks reddening as she denied what he had heard.

He began to work at her foot again and she shook her head with the attempt to straighten her features."Noth-" This time, there was no mistaking the chuckle that escaped her, an infectious sound that had him grinning without even knowing why she was laughing.

He lifted a brow and continued to move his fingers, only linking up the cause and effect of her actions when she erupted once more, covering her mouth as she shook with a laughter that had her eyes tearing. "Are you...ticklish?" He grinned as the responses to his question were gasping cackles as he touched the very point of her foot that activated her funny bone.

Seeing her so undone had him in his own laughing fir, tickling her just to get a laugh as she chuckled uncontrollably, hurling a pillow as best she could when he continued to work at her foot just to see what it did to her. "K-Kill-Killian!" She yelped involuntarily when he hit the spot again and she had no choice but to throw herself down in laughter, having run out of pillows to throw at him.

With a wide smile, he left her feet and planted his arms on either side of her as their laughs subsided into residual giggles and he hovered over her with a smile on his face. She had made his day just by laughing, just by smiling; the unadulterated joy on her face was addictive, something that he wanted to see all day, everyday.

"I love you."

Before she could respond, he reached behind him and she hit his chest as she covered her mouth, not being able to help the laughs that escaped her, hiccuping the first letter of his name as she tried to speak but could barely manage to breathe. "I-I'm going-I'm going to...Ki-Killian." She couldn't get a word out, cheeks flushed as she gathered herself.

"You're going to 'Killian' me?" He asked, chuckling at her broken threats. He wriggled his brows suggestively and she writhed into the pillow beneath him, not being able to contain herself. She just laughed at a comment she normally would've shook her head at but she just couldn't stop laughing. "Love, you must be very skilled with your hands to 'Killian' someone."

X

"Since we're trying to stay on pace with both the individual and couple's sessions, I figured we'd pick a certain topic we'd discuss today." He was tip-toeing around her feelings, she could tell by the way his words came as though each had an allegorical meaning and it was up to her if she accepted them or not.

"Is Snow still pursuing the trial?" It was straight to the point and divergent from what he was talking about but nevertheless, she wished to settle her curiosity.

"I'm sorry?"

"The trial...I know you're on Snow's council and I know she's still talking about putting me on trial. I'm asking you if she's made a decision."

Archie shook his head, pushing his glasses up as he moved to look her in her eyes, assuring her that he was being genuine. If they were going to continue with therapy, that was the one thing he had to assure her of; he was going to maintain an honest relationship in which she could trust him not to divulge any of her information despite him even thinking that it would help her.

"Any more questions before we begin?" She offered a small smile to decline him, giving the go ahead to continue with whatever he had planned. "I want to talk about something you said in your last couple's session." Regina nodded, absently moving her hand around the emerald stone on her finger, only hearing the paper rustling as he turned the page in his yellow notepad. "You said, and I'm paraphrasing, _'The last man that shut me down died.'_"

Her cyclic motions paused and the cricket took note, pressing his pad of paper close to his chest as he softened his tone, attempting to approach her as easily as he knew how. "Tell me about that."

"Tell you about...what?" She became guarded, slowing the movements of her hands so that they became more methodic, the twisting of her ring seemingly like a twirling dance rather than a nervous tell.

"Tell me about the man who shut you down. Tell me about your marriage." He had dissected Killian and Mila's relationship, it was only fitting that he do the same here, that the insecurities are sought after rather than allowed to sit dormant until randomly triggered.

"Don't..." She looked up, wrinkling her nose at his words with an expression that he was unable to decipher. "Don't call it that." She was still behind her walls but her eyes seemed to have missed the memo, filling with an untold sadness that he had yet to see from the former Queen. "A marriage is supposed to be something beautiful, it...it's supposed to seal you and your true love together." She paused, saying nothing as she looked passed him, lost in a sea of unexperienced memories and ruined dreams that she didn't want to think of. "That wasn't a marriage."

"What was it?" He probed, not even taking a moment to write down his thoughts, afraid to hinder what she was going to say to him.

Silence sat between them for more than a moment and her eyes fell back to her hands. To the ceiling, To her pinkey, to her middle finger, to the floor, to the ceiling, to her pinkey, to her middle finger to the floor, to the ceiling...

She stopped, muttering a word that he could barely make out. "Hell." She looked up with watery eyes and the hesitation was clear as her voice rose barely above a whisper. "It was hell."

"But you got through it?" He led gently, allowing her to go at the pace that suited her.

"_I _got through it." But the young girl that entered the agreement, that walked down the aisle in a dress that she felt chained to, she never made it through. She was gone, having lost too much to continue.

"Regina, I know this is hard for you, but I'd just like to get a feel for what your.." He couldn't call it a relationship and he couldn't call it a marriage. "...your experience was like."

"Why does it matter?" She didn't want to talk about it; the past was the past, a box that she had long packed up and sent away. She had no desire to discuss the confines of her 'experience' jut to have the memories come knocking, possibly to knock her down in the process.

"It matters because our experiences in the past always have a way of affecting the present. I've found that it's good to explore previous...experiences while venturing into new things because if you don't know history, you're doomed to repeat it and if we never learn why we've done things then we're destined to do it again."

Regina's eyes darkened at the conclusion of his sentence, breath tensing. "Nothing like that can ever happen to me again." It was less of a statement and more of a mantra, as if she were saying it to herself and not the red-headed cricket she sat in front of.

He nodded, not wanting to hit a nerve. "It's just..you said that you didn't want to hurt him, Killian, Captain Jones. You said you'd leave him before you hurt him."

"I would-"

"But Regina, what I want you to understand is that you don't need to hurt anybody. This time can be different."

"Do you know what you're saying?" She questioned, her voice teetering on the air of frantic. "Of course this is different, it has to be different-Every time I was beneath him, I could barely breathe, Every child I lost was just another mar that he could hold against me and I was nothing more than an inadequate replacement to stand in the shadows of a woman long gone." She took a breath, knowing within herself that she wouldn't be able to take much more of the session if it continued in this direction. "I wouldn't be in this relationship if it were anything but _different._"

"Eva?"

She struck pale. "What?"

"Queen Eva, I take it that she's the woman you're talking about?"

"Who else would it be?" Her question has him leaning back against his chair, pondering the similarities.

"I think you've conquered more than you know."

She was defensive; she was hurt. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You allowed yourself to fall for a man that had lost a love." He shrugged, setting his pen and pad down so that his hands could join in front of him. "If you weren't strong enough to deal with that part of your past then I doubt you would have thrown yourself into a situation so blatantly similar." He lifted a brow, eyeing the Queen as she shifted, deep in thought. "Have you even thought about Killian comparing you to Mila, other than wanting to protect you?"

She shook her head, the voice that came from her being smaller than intended. "He never made me feel like I was a replacement."

For the first time in a long time, she was special.

X

Her session had ended an hour ago but she was nowhere to be seen. He had called her but she never picked up the phone and he'd heard her voice-mail more times than he would have liked. Minutes from going out the door himself, the woman he searched for walked through it and he sighed in relief, standing on the top three steps as she closed the door behind her.

She pressed a hand to her forehead as she spoke, barely above a whisper. "Can you pick Henry up from the bus stop?"

"Sure, love..." He could never deny her like that, watching as she closed her eyes to ward off the tears that she didn't want to succumb to. "Has something happened?"

She shook her head a he approached her, eyes moving from him to the floor as she attempted to contain herself but was failing just as miserably as she had that morning. The only difference was the intent of the tears in her eyes, the reason behind them.

"What's troubling you?" With a gentle tone, his thumb flitted against her cheek and she could do no more than accept what she knew.

"You're nothing like him." To admit that was her undoing, what undid the string to unravel her emotions and allow the tears to flow from her eyes. This was different, it would always be different and that alone comforted her beyond compare.

When her head fell against his shoulder in sobs that stole her breath, he knew who _'him'_ was; he was the only other person that he had been compared to in regards to their relationship and telling by where she came from, he was surely a factor in her tears.

But if she had to cry to get to the other side of her breakthrough, or her redemption, then he would hold her until there where no tears left to cry.

She was that special to him.


End file.
